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My new home... the couch.

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Submitted by worst_stepmom_ever on Tue, 03/24/2015 - 5:31am

I have my new home here on the couch. I've been spending more and more nights out here lately since I can't deal with DH's complete lack of trying anymore. I am still going through the motions making an effort with him and SD but I am also planning an exit strategy and considering a move over the summer once DD is out of school and at her dad's if things continue like they have been.

So dumb.

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Submitted by worst_stepmom_ever on Sat, 03/07/2015 - 2:19am

I was stupid for thinking that this could work. I've done everything on my end and DH is actually being MORE of an ass the more I try. Practically it doesn't make sense for me to leave until the end of DD's school year and it will be nothing short of a miracle if I stay through the summer. I'm already looking into moving far FAR away from here. I want a fresh start since this place holds nothing but bad memories for me.

Depressed

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Submitted by worst_stepmom_ever on Sun, 03/01/2015 - 2:35pm

This weekend has been rough. Last night after the kids went to bed I calmly sat down with DH and told him that this wasn't working for me. I told him I wasn't blaming him and I didn't want to get into a huge fight, but neither one of us is happy and so I think it's best that we part ways. I told him I didn't want to do anything rashly, that we'd take the time that we need to figure out how to split things and whatnot evenly since there wasn't a rush.

Aftermath

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Submitted by worst_stepmom_ever on Fri, 02/27/2015 - 6:37pm

As I'm writing this, I'm at exchange. BM was going to let DH have SD two weekends in a row since he had been deployed. Well the first weekend she said she had plans Friday so this weekends visit was going to be Sat-Sun. Not a problem. So in the meantime, I make arrangements for my DD to sleep over at a friend's Friday night so we can have alone time, especially since things had been so rocky before DH left.

I stood up for myself

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Submitted by worst_stepmom_ever on Fri, 02/27/2015 - 3:20am

Well, it happened earlier than I would have liked it to or expected, but tonight I stood up for myself to my H. He put me in another impossible situation and rather than just not saying anything and stewing over it, I told him how I felt and he didn't take it well. So I told him that's fine, that I loved him and cared about him but that I deserve to be with someone who will make me a priority as much as I make them a priority, and that if he wasn't willing to do that then we should part ways.

I think I'm ready

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Submitted by worst_stepmom_ever on Wed, 02/25/2015 - 12:36am

I think I'm ready for the incoming SK shitstorm. The time apart has provided a lot of clarity and therapy has helped a lot as well. My therapist and I spent today basically developing a gameplan for what to do once DH is back.

I'm to tell him that I'm not going to deal with his daughter's issues, that I love him, but it is not healthy for me. My therapist said he WILL get pissed off and to either take my anxiety meds right before or right after.

Thanks DH...

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Submitted by worst_stepmom_ever on Thu, 02/12/2015 - 11:03pm

Yes, because after I'm already in a bad mood from your parents trying to start drama with me on Facebook, and me being sad because you didn't bother to think of me for Valentine's Day, the thing I TOTALLY want to talk about is how great and wonderful your conversation with SD was.

Seriously?

The fact that he didn't even call me is just adding insult to injury.

I just told him to have fun and that I'd talk to him whenever.

To say I'm over today would be an understatement.

I literally have nightmares about Step-Hell

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Submitted by worst_stepmom_ever on Sun, 02/08/2015 - 9:33am

I feel like it's Game of Thrones... "Winter is coming" LOL. But seriously, it's like I'm physically and mentally trying to brace myself for being thrown back in the fire of having to deal with SD4/BM/DH dynamic. I WANT to think that magically SD's behavior has improved. I mean, she is four after all.

But on the other hand, I think of how she was violent and aggressive, the nonstop screaming for hours... not to mention having to deal with her BPD BM, and I just get depressed/anxious. I have nightmares about dealing with the situation and nightmares about DH leaving over it.

BM joining a "self improvement" pyramid scheme/cult... Zero f*cks given.

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Submitted by worst_stepmom_ever on Wed, 01/28/2015 - 1:34pm

I had an appointment with my therapist yesterday who said that I've been making huge progress in the 6 months that DH has been gone. I found out the other day that BM has joined one of these self improvement seminar pyramid scheme/cult type of deals and the old me would have begun documenting/researching out of fear that BM would take off with SD and DH would be heartbroken. Now, I mention it, but just leave it at that. It's DH's problem and I'm here to support him, but I'm not going to get stressed out or get involved BM's insanity.

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