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weekendwidow's Blog

I think I am finally learning...

weekendwidow's picture

So, a LOT of my upset in my marriage has to do with the fact that I can't mind my own damned business. When my asshole SS17 pulls his usual crap, I'm supposed to ignore it! When I don't ignore it, my DH takes it personally, gets defensive and we end up in a huge fight. Same goes for SS21. I need to mind my own frigging business. I need to stop caring about how HIS kids turn out. I need to stop worrying about other peoples' children. I don't get involved when my best friend tells me something about HER kids...I don't offer my advice or parental viewpoints when she's venting.

When will I friggin learn?

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So it seems SS17 is more of a loser than I thought. He is driving a vehicle that was given to him because of a death in the family. He feels entitled to it. Whatever. He lives with his BM but WE pay his car insurance - nearly $2500 a year. He's supposed to pay half. We prepaid for the year to save a little $ and SS17 is supposed to pay us back a little every month...he is now 3 months behind. I don't ask, because whenever I mention SS17 my DH gets his knickers in a twist and we fight. SO I disengaged.

Oh HALE no

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Hey SS17, you think you can walk all over your mom and dad? Well, you're right. You can. They let you get away with sloth, disrespect, poor grades, smoking weed and drinking. You think I will put up with your bullshit? Ummm...HALE no.

Your mom wants to ship your ass over to my house this summer. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh. My. God. Can you even imagine how horrible I will make that for you? Can you see yourself following my rules, doing chores, saying yes ma'am, no ma'am, thank you and please? Will you pass your random drug tests? Umm...no, no, no, no, no and HALE no.

Feeling Better

weekendwidow's picture

So, last week I had it out with my DH. I told him how I just don't give a rat's ass about his son and daughter any more. I said, "You tell me all about what they're doing and how it pisses you off and then ask for advice but when I give my honest opinion, you start defending them. SO, I'm keeping my mouth shut. How you raise you're kids is NONE of my business. They don't give a shit about me, so I'm no longer engaging in a parenting role for them, after all I'm just the step mom."

My skids are just like my ex!

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When I was venting to my DH about how poorly his kids treated me, dismissed me, ignored me and disrespected me it hit me like a ton of bricks. I realized that was the way my ex treated me! I didn't put up with from him (after years, that is) so I'm not about to put up with it from two people to whom I have no allegiance. Duh. AT least this epiphany didn't take 17 years to realize!

I am JUST the step mom

weekendwidow's picture

For the longest time, I wanted the Brady Bunch family. I (very naively)thought we could all "blend" and be a family. Now I know differently and have to accept that I am JUST the step mom. I will not be respected...since my SD21 and SS17 don't even respect their own dad or themselves, for that matter.

I will not be remembered on my birthday or mother's day (see above) I am JUST the step mom. I will not hear "Hi, how are you?" or "Thank You" or "I care" or "Do you need help"?. I am JUST the step mom.

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