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Update - SD flight booked!

tigerlily's picture

Submitted by tigerlily on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 11:19am

SD18 got home after 10PM last night. I was outside in the back talking to someone on the phone. I eventually hear our house phone ring nonstop. Somebody kept calling over and over. Of course, I know that means it's their mom and she's pissed. So I knew DH had talked to SD. Amazingly I didn't hear any yelling.

DH told SD18 that she cannot have her friends over at our house for her birthday party due to the crap she posted on fb - it sounded like they were going out bowling, then planning to come back and take over our house. He said he knows about what she has been putting on fb, that is was uncalled for, completely inappropriate, and will not be tolerated. And her phone is gone. (That's what he said, her phone is not off as of yet). She just walked away and went downstairs, talked to mommy, and then our phone started to blow up. I unplugged it. DH shut his cell phone off.

We checked her fb, right after this, she posted: "I hate you. What do you think of that?"

I woke up this morning and mom has on her fb that she has booked the flight FOR NEXT WEDNESDAY for SD18. SD also had it on her fb. Neither have said anything yet to DH about it, but I don't care.

I already feel relief. I'm a little ashamed about how excited I am. Especially since we worked so hard to bring them here (a modification, which eventually led to a custody trial, etc. and the $$$$). Now I can't wait for her to be OUT. Even better...I did not have to pay for it!!

SS15 is another story. He's a punk, but I can handle him a bit more than SD. They had his first meeting with probation officer and did not get the official go ahead for him to leave the state to go live with mom. DH is supposed to get final word yet this week since there are a few details that have to be ironed out.

Thanks for everyone's advice and input yesterday...it was incredibly helpful for my own sanity. I'm not sure what DH is gonna do about her cell phone, now that he knows she's leaving. My best guess is he will just shut it off right after she flies there. I highly doubt he will shut it off now since it's less than a week away (although I think he should). We will see. That doesn't even really matter so much to me anymore since next week at this time, she will be out and it will be off anyway.

We have a long road ahead of us still and lots of healing to do. I keep telling myself it's not going to be easy, but without her and her nonstop drama, it will be easier.

We will have a lot of "clean up" to do. I wouldn't be surprised if she doesn't do anything with her disgusting room except pack a suitcase. In that case, I am fully prepared to throw things away, or dump it (and all the trash along with it) in boxes and await for her or mommy to send money to mail her things to her. I have no problem sending all of her garbage on the floor, dirty/stinky clothes and underwear, and all the other crap right back to her on their dime. Fully prepared to do that. I'm so excited to not have our basement (her bedroom) stink all the time!!!

Comments

gladtheyrenotmine's picture

Submitted by gladtheyrenotmine on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 11:24am

You should make her old room into the most absolutely amazing room of the house....and then declare that it's reserved strictly for those paying the bills in the house.

skylarksms's picture

Submitted by skylarksms on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 11:25am

Too bad your DH wouldn't just shut it off now (she IS grounded from it, right??) AND as another part of her "punishment" (shouldn't be - should be normal human courtesy but whatever) is to scrub her room (under DH's watchful eye) from top to bottom.

Willow2010's picture

Submitted by Willow2010 on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 11:42am

Wow… OMG…Your DH needs to turn that phone off now. I would be damned if a kid is going to talk crap like that about ME on a phone I pay for. Oh hell no.

When is SS going, I would pack his ass up and send him right along with her. Don’t care how much it cost. You are taking this much better than I would. Good Luck!

Jsmom's picture

Submitted by Jsmom on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 11:44am

Just bide the time until she leaves. Stay out of her way. He is going to be feeling incredibly guilty and will try to over compensate....DH did and then she just pushed him until he drove her to her BM. He still feels guilty, but it has been two years next month and I think all he feels now is that her life is ruined and that he is not to blame, BM is. Guilt lessens with time.

Be prepared for backlash at you. I got it for awhile, now he is really careful not to say anything that makes me feel bad. He did tell me at lunch today that he saw her grades and looks like she will be going to summer school....It was great he could talk about it and not blame anyone but SD now....

Ommy's picture

Submitted by Ommy on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 12:18pm

I would take it further. No only does the phone need to be shut off now, because right now your husband is saying there is only a week, well when she leave will he ba saying how will I talk to her? And keep it on longer….

I would also instruct her that by the time she leaves EVERYTHING that she wants sent to her when her mom sends the money needs to be boxed up, to be looked at by you and your Husband. So that way nothing gets put in that she doesn’t own. Anything not in a box will NOT be shipped when prepaid for by BM it will instead be tossed, craigs listed or given away. If she wants to pay hard ball I would make her world end. And if you want to be a real witch I would make her find her own way to the airport….
}:)

Sweetnothings's picture

Submitted by Sweetnothings on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 12:25pm

When our sd21 left, I was sooo happy! She didn't pack, just emptied drawers into her suitcases! Nasty, dirty clothes, all mixed up, etc,etc.I had to go into the room afterwards and blitz it, loved doing that, very theraputic !
The stuff under the bed was appalling !! Dirty underwear, food, and worse !

Funny, when she visited briefly last year and was under my roof for two, VERY long nights, I went in after she had left to air and tidy, and lo and behold there was empty food wrappers under the bed and other bits of rubbish ! She had a bin in her room, and in the bathroom, so no change there !!

There will be no shrines to ADULT skids in our house, never ! And they are not living with us again !!

Start the countdown for when she goes next week !!

imthewife's picture

Submitted by imthewife on Thu, 03/22/2012 - 1:59pm

Glad to hear they are leaving. A bitch for a SD and a SS on probation...nice combo.

Can't wait to see how long it is before you are posting that they are begging to come back!