Going Crazy
Ok, we will start with this. I have 2 bio children of my own d10 and s14. I now have 7 skids. We have no kids together. The ages range from 18-3. We were 13 hours away and for the first year did not see them but on holidays. We got married and moved to be closer to them, but this was not the only reason my DH had job offers and his Dad was in the area as well and needed help because of his health. We just recently found out the SD3 was his because BM admitted that SD3 wasn't his because she stated it was someone else's who she was seeing while they were married. Long story short. When they are over on certain weekends because there is no set schedule really when they do come over. I feel second and my kids feel second. DH will do things with them that he doesn't do with my kids. My kids call him Dad because their bio dad has nothing to do with them. He wants to adopt them and I am not saying he treats them bad because he doesn't. I just think we should not have one set of rules when they are here and another when they are not here with us. Most of the time she will only text call him when her man isn't there or has left her yet again. When she does text it is mostly about their kids. When it is not about their kids she is putting my kids in the middle of things. Saying they are mental cases, not very bright and behave very badly, which is not the case at all. She has even texted him calling me names. This pisses me off, I try not to react to it, but don't know how much more I can take. I have talked with DH about this, and told him how I felt about the rules and all. Sometimes I think he may not realize what he does. I told him that he has to be a parent and be strict like he does with my D10. He does see how much this is bothering me. I love all the kids and don't like feeling this way. When they are over I just want to go hide and the SD3 we have yet to have over to the house and get to know her yet so this is yet another challenge. He hasn't even spent time with her. He has always made sure I am aware of everything that goes on so I will not feel left out and know everything that is going on. I do feel I separate myself from him and them when they are over. Sorry for the ramble just needed to get this out again.
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7 STEPKIDS??!!! SEVEN!!!!!
7 STEPKIDS??!!! SEVEN!!!!! HOLY HELL GIRL WHAT WERE YOU THINKING??!!!! sorry... But good God I could NEVER!!!!! I'M Sorry its really late here and I don't have enough energy to type out a reply at the moment but I will tomorrow and I'm sure many others will as well. Have a good night.
I have had so many people ask
I have had so many people ask me that "What were you thinking are you crazy 7 Skids?" He does not respond to her or feed into here BS. I do think tht she is mad because he is with me to a certain degree and I now have what she once did, if that makes sense. She just needs to leave my kids out of it and stop saying things about them. DH and I have talked more about this, because I have been very upset the last couple days, and it has been showing. I have let my emotions, at time get the best of me. He tell me if soemthing needs done or if something isn't going the way you want it to tell them that when they are at our house, and he will stand by me 100% because they are kids and will not run the house. To me this is easier said than done. We have also been talking about the rules, etc... He said he feels as if he has a chance with my 2 kids, which they think of as their dad to get his point accross because they are with us. Example just regular manners, rules, etc... He says he feels it is to late for the Skids because they are only over at our house for a bit here and there on weekends. I told him he can not think like that. Like I said earlier he is not mean to my kids at all. He is really wonderful and has helped me out so much, with my kids because in my 1st marrige there was alot of domestic violence, drug use with my ex and my son saw all of this and really had a hard time with it. He has turned around tremendously with therapy and positive enforcements and a good make role model. I just need to figure out should I just keep quiet and disengage or if something is going on I do not like or agree with reagrding the Skids or BM should I make it known and try to lay down rules and interact more with Skids than I do now? I know this is all over the place, sorry for the ramble. At least I can get feelings out here, becuse I don't want my emotions to explode like they have the past couple days.