I go through the kids rooms every 3 months or so when they are at the "others" houses and throw out anything they haven't touched. Clothes, toys, whatever... if they don't play with it or wear it (season appropriatly of course) its gone. They have never noticed. I have been doing this for 7 years...

Tell them you had to get rid of the old, to make room for the new but I would also tell them that if they can't keep it clean there will be no new... and more of the old will start disappearing too!

I couldn't agree with you more. I have to say that I was a clean freak before I married DH. I also didn't own a bunch of stuff, not because I couldn't afford it, but because I can't stand a cluttered house. DH instead lived with crap for years and never threw anything away...heck, he still doesn't! My son has so much stuff it drives me nuts...

So anyway, a few months ago I was worn out and found this book

http://www.amazon.com/Simplify-ebook/dp/B006431ADS/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-...

It's called Simplify...it's a cheap little book that literally transformed our lives. Heck, my husband hates to clean up or throw stuff away and he hates to read most of all and even HE read it and got so excited that for a few weeks we went room by room cleaning up crap and getting rid of stuff. Amazingly enough, honestly, I can't remember what I got rid of as i have not even missed it! We have one room left, that one is a bit overwhelming, but we'll get there. Everytime we do it, we feel completely refreshed and peaceful. I really recommend it.

Good luck!

My 10 yr old daughter is like a hoarder. She keeps everything. About once every 2 months I go in her room while she is at school and I throw so much away. She doesn't even notice whats missing. And her closet is still full of shit!! This kid keeps everything, its so annoying. I hate clutter, it gives me anxiety!!

When they leave stuff in the living room I gather it all and toss it into their rooms. Or I throw it away. Depends on what kind of mood I am in. }:)

I made the fatal mistake once of putting a pair of too-small pyjamas of my SD10's into the charity box. She was heartbroken! She moaned and whined to her dad and told him I was mean, and they were her favorite pj's and how I could I do that to her, and on and on and on. It so happened that the box had gone to the home of her one-size-smaller friend, and so Daddy called up friend's mother and told her that the pj's were precious (gag me) and could SD10 please have them back. You would think I had cut off her hair in her sleep for all the drama.

A similar catastrophe happened when her dad threw out an old toothbrush of hers. We could have written a tragic opera with that scene. I insisted the reason Daddy had thrown it out was because each kid had THREE toothbrushes in the cup, and as they had just received new ones, there was no reason to keep them all. One could be thrown out, and that way we could all fit our toothbrushes into the cup. She accused me of stealing from her, fished it out of the garbage, begged, pleaded and whined for Daddy to boil it for her, and put it back in the cup. Which he did, making no room for MY toothbrush, so now I have to keep mine in a separate cup.

I can't throw out anything of theirs. Not even a dirty kleenex. If they agree it can be thrown out, I hold out the garbage can and have them put it in there themselves, so they can't accuse me of anything.

Needless to say they have far too much stuff/junk/crap/garbage/toys/papers, etc. Their rooms are never tidy, and their dad won't throw out any piece of paper one of them have ever taken a crayon to.

I wish I knew how you all got away with it. I'm a live simply kind of person, and they are all pack rat/hoarders.

My skids rooms are complete pack rat disasters. As in, it's often hard to walk through them because there's no clear path unlittered with crap, toys, clothes, everything.

The rest of the house is tidy because I cannot stand clutter. Drives me crazy and makes me uneasy like a lot of other posters.

When they leave their crap everywhere, I just toss it back into their rooms. At first I used to neatly put stuff in a pile in their room. Now I don't even bother to hide the fact that I just tossed it in from the doorway.

Once my son had a friend over and SS's room door was open and the kids eyes got wide and he said, "Why is SS's room like that?!" I mean, can you imagine how crack den messy a room has to be, to shock a 10 year old boy???

I just said, "Because he's messy" but I really thought to myself, "Because his dad doesn't care about it much, and his mother is a complete slob and he used to living in slothdom at her house."

I used to have the "earn it back" box for my own BDs. Worked like a charm. I started it when they were toddlers, and they had to do a chore to earn each thing back. Back then the chores were, folding the clean facecloths from the laundry, or bringing in the mail from the mailbox. The chores got bigger as the kids got bigger, and by the time they were in kindergarten, the box was no longer needed.

I truly wish I could implement the box now for the SKIDS, but their father would harangue me without mercy. He already thinks I expect far too much of them, and does not correct them or reprimand them when they shout at me that I'm mean, and I just throw their stuff around so I can make their lives harder.

He just doesn't hear it. God forbid I ever raise my voice to one of them though. What am I doing here?

My SD5 likes to keep EVERYTHING and puts NOTHING away. She is getting better at putting her dirty clothes in the hamper but I usually have to ask her to do it.
To get ride of junk (pieces of papers she writes on or tears up but doesn't want thrown away, make up her BM gives her - that crumbs and makes a mess on my white carpets, McDonalds toys etcs), I keep it around until she seems to be losing interest. Then the week she's not with us I hide it. If she doesn't ask for it the week she's back with us, I take it as a sign it's now safe to through away.
It's hard to pick up after DH and SD all the time - it's exhausting and makes me feel like a maid.