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OT kinda - Baptism, Annulment and the Church - really just a vent

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So DD is almost 4 months old and I'm trying to get a baptism scheduled for her but as usual I keep running into roadblocks because DH & I are not married in the church. We are not married in the church because DH doesn't want to have to go thru the annulment process which I kind of understand but I swear if someone has the nerve to tell me that I'm going to hell again because of this I'm going to hurt them.

SS and DS

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My SS just turned 22 and my DS just turned 3 - their birthdays are a week apart. I don't have huge issues with my SS, all in all he's a decent kid just totally used to getting everything he wants. He got a new car when he turned 16 and then another new casr for HS graduation 2 years later. He has every gadget known to man and pre-orders all the latest greatest stuff. That's fine by me, BM foots the bill for all of it, the cars, the insurance and all the gadgets - well everything but the college tutition. He rarely asks us for money because usually BM handles everything.

Just an update on the SIL email

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Well after alot of thought on my part, I finally pushed this all off on DH. I told him last night that I think she should have emailed him in the first place about trying to heal the old wounds and that I thought he should respond to her. I did ask that he run what he sends her by me and that my feelings are I'm ok with meeting her for dinner next time she's in town - I think she only comes down 1-2 times a year - somewhere other than our house. In regards to her being around our bios, I felt like I need to know there would be no drama before I brought them around her.

OT My SIL has pics of my DS on her FB page and DH is in big trouble

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Ok seems innocent enough except for the fact that my DS is 3 and has never seen this woman in his life. My SIL is not a part of our lives and hasn't been for over 5 years now. DH & I had to disengage from her because she was just crazy. One day it was all peace and niceness and the next it was I was keeping her brother from her because I wouldn't let her hang all over him. So we were friends on FB and then I unfriended her because I was just tired of her repsonses that I was ungrateful for my children and had no idea how lucky I was.

Question regarding disengaging for the bio-parent

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Ok I was thinking this morning during the 4am feeding about this and wanted to get your thoughts.

There seems to be an upswing in DHs who are disengaging from their adult bios due to all the stress & drama they bring to our lives. I also noticed that I'm not alone in watching my DH disengage with SD who is now 16 due to all the stress and PAS that is/was going.

What's really the difference? Is it that she's still under 18? So when she turns 18, it's all ok because she instantly knows what she's doing to DH is wrong?

Well hello there

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I've been here a little while and posted on a few topics but thought I should provide some sort of background since sometimes my situation sounds a little strange even to me.

I've been married to my DH for 8 years now and am the BM to DS who is 2.5 and due in about 9 weeks a little girl. For the most part our lives involving the skids is pretty much no existant. SS is 21 and SD is 15.