20 years and BM still obsessed with this house.
BM has not lived in this house for 20, yes count them 20 years. She only lived a total of maybe a year here, because she refused to move in and stayed back on the other side of the country. They divorced soon after she did move here.....20 YEARS AGO. (Can't curse so I am shouting) By the way, this house is not the Taj Mahal it is just a house.
Her one kid hinted about her moving into the downstairs apartment 8 years ago. I found her here when she snuck in 7 years ago. She kept parking her used cars to sell in front of our cul de sac until I threatened to call the police because they were illegally parked. I kicked her off of our driveway this year.
She recently was permitted to see her 5 year old granddaughter after years of being barred... On first visit with me since contact with crazy BM granddaughter says "You know Nana lived here before you"
I said well that was a long... long time ago.
Should have said yes but Grandpa is much happier with me... Any other suggestions? Maybe ... It has been so long ago I am surprised that completely obsessed lunatic remembers? Too Much?
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Smudge
get her energy out of there! She does indeed sound phsycho, but not in a fun happy way.
Perhaps saying something a bit more positive to grandkid - since we are always reminded that we steps cannot say anything negative about High Conflict Golden Uterus Bio Mothers (except here), I think that extends to the high conflict golden uterus bio Grandmothers as well. Something such as how YOU have lived there the absolute LONGEST,and look what improvements you made and dear gradnchild do you know that HERE was the blah blah blah. Deflection and reditection seems to be the best way to deal with comments such as those.
Sage the place, get that ghost out of there!
I have saged! And it helps.
Only say kind things to grandchild for sure. Just looking for some venting snarkisms for fun.
"I know she lived here! It
"I know she lived here! It was a long, long time ago, when I was only 12-years-old."
"Grandma, did you know steppingback was only 12 when you lived in her and Grandpa's house?"
This is perfect. I am 12 years younger.
Ah ha ha....
"Thank goodness I live here
"Thank goodness I live here now or this place would be as nasty as 'grandma's' face?"
"And even though 'grandma' made such a huge impact on this house for that one year, over 20 years ago, gramps and I have managed turn it around and make it home"
LOL, I'm not good at this!
Nasty as grandma's face!
Perfect. She is bitter.
Funny. I actually see her so little it is hard for me to recognize. There is a blessing!
To the kid I wouldn't have
To the kid I wouldn't have said anything other than what you did. Maybe "yep well things change"
As far as the ex goes - if she is still not over it theres some mental health issues there so probably not much to be done but ignore her.
We are selling soon, but first we need to fix the plumbing.
I would leave this house tomorrow and not look back. It is renovated and looks nice, but all the plumbing needs to be replaced because the PVC joints from that era are defective and spontaneously burst in the walls. We are 2/3 done. We can't sell before we finish that. We have 2 last bathrooms to do. The bursting doesnt happen often but it will continue. Maybe I know a motivated buyer. Hey crazy BM want this house? Pay for it.
LOL, my house too!
We are currently in the process of purchasing our home now, and oh boy is it a fixer upper. The electrical system needs complete overhaul, the furnace too. A main bathroom and the kitchen need complete gutting and replacing. Exterior and interior painting.
But the thing is I absolutely love it. And every new thing we do to improve it makes me love it more. We live close to the beach (20 minute drive), in a not-so-desireable location, but in a comfortable ok neighborhood.
BM lives a mile away so exchanges are easy (maybe too easy! lol)
She lived here for maybey 6-7 years, DH here 13 years, me 5. By my calculations, when SD13 turns 18 and graduates, Ill have overtaken her number, we will have good credit standing, debts all paid off, good equity, and all improvements made (hopefully!!!)
Good luck in renovating and selling!!!
Love all the good snarks, too. Heres one:
Yeah she lived here for a brief moment in time that will not be repeated again. Confusing and vague.
When she left this house under court order.
She took everything including the fridge and dishwasher. She didn't even have visitation with her kids at the time because of hiding them for two weeks. Left her kids with no beds or fridge. DH had to start from scratch. Truly self-centered and crazy. Her sons were too young to really remember this nonsense and haven't been told.
I like the house now that we fixed it up, but want something smaller, walking distance to the beach, larger windows... And less history.
It's not the house she's
It's not the house she's obsessed with. It's DH.
Yes, the house is only her wedge.
She never thought he would divorce her. He is a sweet loyal guy. She pushed him too far. He has not spoken to her in @ 12 years at OSS HS graduation before my time. He said never again. There was no child support, no scheduled visitation. But she keeps trying. As house techie I block her from all new numbers, Facebook, telephone. Well years of stories.
But she will use anything, grandchildren included. She used her 13 year old son to serve court papers.
One of the OG crazy BMs.
That why you never moved into
The old home. Always get a your home. That nobody you know lived in
You are so right.
In my situation it has made things waaay more difficult. I am ready to go.