SS14's bday weekend with BM
SS was so very excited for his weekend with bm. She made him promises of go carts and movies and parties and presents and fun! Fun! Fun!
What a surprise (not) when we picked him up and he had four helium balloons and a pair of shoes (nothing fancy). We asked about the fun weekend and he said he got to open presents Friday night and they went to "some movie" on Saturday.
When we got home and he put away his two Fiji waters in the fridge (more gifts from bm - they even had "happy bday to my one and only" written on them on sharpie). Then he started asking us what we were doing for his bday. We told him we were having a family dinner party on Sunday and he could invite a friend. He asked if he could have a big party with his friends. We said "sure, but we will need to talk about the bday budget and you can spend it on a party or a gift. Then he asked what we were doing on fri and sat night. We reminded hi he was performing in his play. He asked what we were doing in Thursday, his actual bday. I reminded him that he had play practice till 6:30 and a field trip at school that day and that ds9 had a bball game. I could tell he was sad and I told him that last year was a special bday and that's why he got special gifts, a special party with all his entire class and a night kid with dh. And that as you get older, sometimes it's just as fun to celebrate your bday on different days and it's really about the friends and the celebrations, not necessarily the gifts or the day.
I was planning on getting him some nice, age-appropriate cologne so he'd stop with the axe body spray. Ah says he wants cash to buy a video game. I told dh that cash was a bad idea, "rber last year when he took all of his bday and Christmas money and bm "took" him to the fair and he paid their entire way?"
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Comments
wow...that's sad for your
wow...that's sad for your SS....I never make promises to my kid's I can't keep...
Saddest part is that he
Saddest part is that he thinks Fiji wAter is extremely fancy and expensive. Just like the three pairs of "$20 Nike socks" she got him at Christmas... After promising PS3.
Toxic Fiji water.
Toxic Fiji water.
My SD birthday is 16 days
My SD birthday is 16 days before BD birthday. I always decorate the house for BD and get balloons and do special tea's (if its in the week) and ghave family round etc. Last year, BM promised SD lots of fun too.....OH spoke to his daughter on the morning of her Bday and she sobbed down the phone......BM hadnt even bothered getting her a card, let alone anything else.
SD always comes to ours for tea on Tuesdays, so when OH told me what had happened (as luck would have it it was a Tuesday) I decorated our home for her, got a cake and an extra couple of little gifts for SD so she could have someone "celebrate" with her.
3 weeks later BM bought her a toy using SD Bday money, and BM added to it then told SD that that was her present from her mom. Sick isn't it??
Id rather go without food to provide ANYTHING for my daughter.
Id rather go without food to
Id rather go without food to provide ANYTHING for my daughter.
That is the difference between a Mother and a Golden Uterus.
These moms make me
These moms make me sick...Ours is the opposite...She is so stupid and being used by SS15 to get what he wants. He got specific on the laptop she got him last year for his birthday. He knew to spec it out so she didn't get him the cheapest one, like she did the tablet. She can only be bothered to have dinner with him once every 6 weeks. He is gone for 1.5 hours and then back. Every time it is a case or a new phone, always something. He uses her now and, I have tried telling him not to, but he says she doesn't care and this way he gets exactly what he wants. Saved DH money on the laptop. This was a 1100 laptop designed for gaming and programming that he wanted for his classes and hobbies. As it is for the programming that he wants to do, he really needed it.
I wish he wouldn't have this value system and I have tried to parent him but, he is not mine, it is up to DH. But, honestly, I think the bithc deserves to be used, given she gave him up and has so screwed him up and SD17. We sacrificed one kid for this kid, but she PAS'd the other one right out the door and because of that SS has no respect for her.
I agree that the BM deserves
I agree that the BM deserves the treatment.
Your SS figures, she won't give him her time and attention so he will get something out of it. I don't agree with the principle but I can't blame the kid for it. As long as it is just her and not his Dad, then at least it is saving you guys some money.
I know she deserves to be
I know she deserves to be used and I am sure she knows she is, but she is so lazy, this way she feels she is being his mom. She is the worst parent I have ever seen. I just don't like the value system. Yes it saves DH money and that is fine, but she recently told my husband that my SS was such a great young man and she was proud of who he was becoming. Like she had anything to do with it...I am mom and I am the one that has had to undo all the damage she did with him. His social skills were horrid when we got him full time and I have spent the last 4 years trying to undo that. I will never get credit and she will always be his mom. I am just waiting for the day when he tells me that she is his real mom.
I try not to let it be a factor every time she shows up for her hour and a half steak dinner with SS, but it hurts every single time I ask him "How was dinner, did you have a good time?"....It sucks