BM is still pissed
BM is still pushing for baby to get a passport. BF refuses for many reasons - child will be too young to travel abroad (7 months old), 3 weeks without time with BF is too long, BM has said she will run off to other states to live...BF offered to take baby while BM is gone but BM claims baby is exclusively breastfed. Huge lie!
Get a life BM. Until there is a court order, they have joint custody and BF said no.
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Is she a flight risk?
If so, then I would totally agree with not wanting her to take the baby. If not, well, why not let her take the baby?
The other reasons I could possibly give her the benefit of the doubt on, if she there were no flight risk factors to consider. I don't know why the baby's age would be a factor. Lots of babies travel abroad with their parents. Some are - yikes! - even born there! As long as the child is healthy, the shots are up-to-date and the pediatrician says it's okay, then no problem there.
Three weeks without the father IS a long time... just ask the kid of any active duty service member, who will sometimes lose a parent for up to and even beyond a year at a time. My daughter was only about six weeks old when her dad left for a three-week training deployment. She wasn't much older than this baby when her dad left for Afghanistan and he was gone for almost a year. It was a long time, but they both survived.
I breastfed both of mine exclusively. I started adding cereal to the breastmilk at about five months and then started them with baby food at around 6-7 months. The only milk my two ever had was my breastmilk until they were weaned at 15 mos and 18 mos. So without more info on how exactly she's breastfeeding him, I wouldn't dismiss it out of hand.
As for the lack of a court order, you could look at it this way... there's nothing that says she CAN'T take him and go. Right, wrong or indifferent, breastfeeding the baby always puts the mom in a better position for getting custody, as does just plain old possession. Not busting your chops or anything, just playing devil's advocate and trying to see it both ways. No one knows the intimate details of your situation better than you, BF and BM, including any judge who may end up deciding your fate.
♥ Georgia ♥
"Good men don't just happen. They have to be created by us women." (from ROSEANNE)
yes
BM is somewhat of a flight risk. Both of her parents are dead so she has no super good reason to stay in the state. She has told many people she is moving at the end of the school year, out of state and maybe BF can see baby when she comes back to visit a couple times a year.
No, BM cannot take baby out of the country. BF filed the proper paperwork with the passport administration to be notified if BM tries to get a passport for baby. BF has to sign off before BM can get one but BM is pretty sneaky and may go above the law to get one. BM feels she is above the law and what she says goes.
We know for a fact she is not exclusively breastfeeding. A neighbor girl told us she has fed the baby a bottle of formula several times and there are formula bottles and cans - empty and full - all over the upstairs of the house - kitchen, dining room, entry way in plain site. BM is a slob and a pack rat. Plus, everytime we get baby he wreaks of formula and even his poop is looks like he is formula fed and he spits up formula. RED FLAG!!!
I commend her for trying to breastfeed. I know it can be hard. I have done it for all 3 of my kids and it can be trying and rewarding at the same time. But I never lied about it to get my way. I had to make provisions for my youngest so she could have time with her BF. I pumped and made bottles because no child should go hungry. Recently, BM starting sometimes sending us some (less than 2 ounces for 3 plus hours) breast milk. It is never enough so we add formula to it so he gets enough to eat. We use the same kind we see around the house and that kind is also noted in baby's medical records. Prior to her sending breastmilk, baby would be very unhappy and cry alot cause he was hungry so we would have to cut visits short since BM under fed him and he needed to be fed.