DH and i moved in to our new house in dec, bm made two harassing phone calls about our house being up to code with the pool. Dh handled it awesome and basically told her to pack sand.

BM's dog bit ss in the eye (beginning of dec) and its still bruised thats how bad it was, but bm didnt take ss to urgent care when it happened. Ever since bm has been very cordial and has not been hassling us or starting drama.

Last week, bm, who before said that ss should always be with one of his parents not me who is not "a real parent" left ss with my dh's mom or a friend 2.5 days out of her 5. We got him back yesterday and his face is bruised and scratched from "riding his bike" he still has the scar on his face from where he burnt him self on a hanger when roasting marshmallows in the fire place at bm's. ss's whole body is covered in scrapes and bruises from falling off his bike.

Dh and i know that ss is not being beat, but we do feel like ss is not being watched and that is why he is falling and getting banged up so much. This morning, dh told bm that we dont send him to her like that and why is she sending him to us like that. She needs to get more protective gear or watch him more carefully. bm was very calm and agreed. Bm said she would put him in a better helmet, etc.

10 minutes later bm called back to ask dh about putting ss in counseling for "anger issues".....ok let me paint a picture of ss when hes with us... last night we were on the couch, ss tells dh and i every 5 minutes, i love you dad i love you smnikki. dh and i were laying on the chase lounge part of our couch, ss comes over to cuddle with us. the other day i was upstairs, ss was down stairs, he randomly yells up, LOVE YOU sm nikki!!! i take him grocery shopping, the bagger comments, oh wow what a well behaved little boy, he couldnt possibly be THIS good all the time. YES, he really is this good all the time! if i tell him to do anything, he does it, no lip! if i say clean your room he does it, if i tell him something and leave the room, he still does it. He eats his food, doesnt whine ever, and pretty much always says please and thank you...he even tells me thank you when i buy him the cereal he like for breakfast!

according to bm, ss hurt his leg getting in to his bed at her house and took it out on all the furniture. She said hes very angry and is acting out. Also, she said that mil (her and my mil are bff) took ss to mc donalds and ss didnt want to eat he wanted to play and when mil tried to make him eat he threw him self on the floor and then when she tried to pick him up he repeatedly hit her in the face......SS would NEVER raise a hand to me and never has.

Dh told bm that he needed to think about ss going to counseling, because he doesnt act like that over here and its clearly HER parenting thats causing his behavior issues. Dh and i are glad though that she is finally agreeing to send him because we are sure that if he does go it will be no later than the end of the year that we would most liekly have full custody. ss is always saying that he doesnt want to go back to bm's house, he also acts out at day care on the days he is going back to bm.

I worry what is really going on over there. It seems bm is giving up and just doesnt care to try any more or something.

any advice?