This is my first post and I don't really know where to begin. I'm feeling terribly alone and absolutely exhausted by my situation.
I have a 10 year old SS and a 20 month old biological son. My ss and his mother are causing way more stress than anyone could be expected to handle and my dh's method of dealing with things has left a bitter taste in my mouth.
Things were great in the beginning, between my ss and I. He was only 5 when we got together and we were very close, very quickly. His mother's instability and manipulation has turned him into a mirror image of her. My dh is blinded because his visitation with him is so limited by psycho ex (our courts don't do much for supporting the fathers). Anyway, my dh somewhere along the way seems to think that I am way too hard on the kid. When in fact I have the exact same expectations of him as I do and will have of my own son. I am also a teacher and am not used to letting other people's kids walk all over me. I like to be in control of situations and can't seem to just sit back and watch "unexceptable" behaviour. Yet whenever I say anything to my ss, I am only saying it because he is who he is, not because he deserves it. I'm supposed to leave all the disciplining to dh, which I'd gladly do, if he'd actually DO IT.
Uggh, it's late and I don't have the energy right now... but I just need to know I'm not alone!
I'm worried that our relationship is actually in jeapordy because of everything that is going on and I don't know how to deal with it. Do I just go away when he comes over? He actually accused me of hitting him a few months back and therefore his mother wouldn't let him come over. Sadly it was the most stress free time for me. Until he admitted he lied and contact has resumed, and all the BS has started all over again.
Thanks for listening (and pardon me if this is all over the map, it's late!)