ALL.THE.TIME and here's the rub--he brings home $200 a week after CS and taxes. That's it! He still views himself as the "head of the household" and loves to boss me around. Makes decisions with what is virtually my money (hell it IS my money; we aren't married--thank god--and I'm the breadwinner due to his "situation")all the time.

The other day he was "offering" TO BUY MY NEIGHBOUR'S ADJACENT VACANT (land only) PROPERTY!!! Seriously? My property is in my name only but because Guilty Daddy has done renno work on it, he believes he is building sweat equity when in fact, he is just earning his keep.

NEVER LET A MAN WITH KIDS INTO YOUR HOUSE!

Yes dh has with money before. I fixed that by seperating our money for a while. It worked LOL. But with your situation I don't know what to tell you ill have to think on it.

Exactly why I keep seperate finances. If you do bury him these ladies know a thing or two about what grows pretty ;). I'm no help I kill grass

i have the opposite problem. not on a daily basis, but when we are in a financial crunch, fdh won't do a damn thing to try to fix it. he mopes around, expecting me to pull a miracle out of my ass, and every suggestion i make, he shoots down. i have more than once had to just do what i thought was best because he wasn't going to do a damn thing but sit there looking pissed off. this happened last summer. big money troubles. i had a pretty simple fix for it, really the only thing that could be done at all. his response, as USUAL, was "that won't make any difference". really, you moron? having money for gas and groceries won't make a difference as opposed to being penniless? he wouldn't do what i told him to do, but i did it on my end of the income! and guess what? it WORKED. so he says "i think our new plan is going to work out." (insert steam eared emoticon here). it wasn't a "plan", it was the only thing we could do. it wasn't "our" anything, it was ME seeing the only thing we could do. it still took his ignorant ass 2 months to do the same thing, so God knows how much money we lost due to his stupidity and stubborness.

we are in a bad situation once again. his past keeps coming back to haunt us. (debt issues). i have done what little i can do, he as usual has done nothing. i am more than willing to move out and leave him here to suffer alone if he lets this shit get any more out of control than it already is. if he wants to sit back and do nothing and lose everything, he can go right ahead, but my kids and i will NOT suffer with him. and i have no doubt, he expects me to fix everything. that's what he always expects. so he does nothing. fucking ignorant asshole.

DH has conversations with me about these things inside of his head. His "practice" conversation if you will. Most of the time they go so well, that he feels his practice conversation was good enough for both of us.
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That actually made me LOL!!!

I am surprised my DH has not come up with that yet!

Bi I understand your situation. Spent 15 yrs with a man just like him. It's mentally draining. I hope your situation works out for the best for you and your kids. Some men just don't care.

yeah, he tried that early in our marriage, until i'd had enough of the debt collectors, his whole family trying to suck him dry, etc... i separated accounts, insisted he get a second job and turn over ALL finances to me. we separated awhile because of this. so, it depends on how badly you want to fix it because you'll definitely have to create a crisis in your marriage if he will not work with you on it.