Alright, this blog entry is written to quell the burning questions everyone has as to why I'm this depressed about everything. As well as to address the other comments about "oh at least you're not from Rwanda" because in reality, and in various respects, it IS possible to be worst off than a Rwandan.

Just to warn you and in advance, this is very much a rant and rave. Choose carefully before replying.

Let us start with the obvious and the unapparent, the obvious being an "obvious immigrant" such as a Rwandan and the "Unapparent immigrant" such as a Canadian.

The day of the week I hate the most.

The day that I spend the entire day hating myself and wanting to die.

It's the day the sd gets to go to the grandparents, and the DH has to go because he's being forced. We fight every time. Mostly because of the hatred I have for myself and the fact that I can't get rid of these horrible ideas out of my head.

I can't wait to leave NC, or at least move far away enough so we don't have to deal with these Friday ordeals.

That my parents had better pieces of advice to offer me really than just leaving. They don't see the issue in anything, they go "oh it's only 5 years you'll be barred from re-entering, that's okay."

As I tried to explain to them (and everyone, please don't get offended) that indeed my husband's very very white. We separate for that long the chances of our marriage failing is very good. Women of *cough* my ethnic group will go through heaven and hell to keep their marriages intact, men will too. They'll tolerate distances because that's expected.

For the first time in a long time, it's the first piece of goodnews I've received in a while... but apparently my parents paid off my maxed out mastercard that I stupidly put my tuition on.

Yay...