My husband & I have been together for 8 years and married for almost 5 years. When we met the sks were 12, 14, and 19. The oldest, moved in with her bf at 17 and quit her daddy paid for college program, got pregnant at 21, and is now married to the father. The gsk is now. 5 years old. The two boy sks loriniginally lived with their mother Monday -Friday afternoon, and stayed with us every weekend. My husband & I have had countless aguments about his children. They are so disrespectful, greedy, filled with entitlement, resentful, beyond sloppy and lazy. Ater we married, I agreed to have the youngest boy live with us because the BM cold not handle him. I thought it would be a wonderful opportunity to fix the sk. I had no idea, that it would be constant lying, holes in the walls, anger, disrespect, etc. I was with this sk 24/7 while my husband worked constantly. The raising of his child became my responsibility and burden. There were numerous calls to the Sheriff's Department to help me to get through to this young man. Nothing helped. I did this throughout high school. From day one, my husbands kids have been a huge issue with me. We had these kids every weekend. The BM became too busy with her social life to be a mother. I understand that these kids resented me because They wanted their parents to be together.
Now the youngest is gone, andnI have agreed to let the 18year to live with us to go to college. What a mistake! He has t be told when to shower, when to brush his teeth, to do his homework, just like a 10 year old. It is so frustrating to again have to a babysitter to an ungrateful child.We pay for his college, and his all his needs and he still thin,s we owe him something. His constant disrepect and lying is something I cannot tolerate.
The oldest daughter just shows up almost every weekend to swim, or to attempt to get money to live say beyond her means. It's sickening to see this ungrateful play her little games. I finally blew up last weekend, when husband sided with her being able to come and goin our home as she pleased. She comes over and just sts, does not offer to do anything. She is probably 200 lbs over weight and needs to start doing things for herself.
How can I get over the anger at these children. I no longer want them around me. I believe my husband loves me, but I ha says I have to learn to deal with his children. The stress is huge and I need to learn to cope. Can anyone offer a helpful suggestion?