I am a BM to twin girls and I am also a SM. I love my H to death but thanks to his lovely children i am on the verge of getting divorced. I have known my H for 6 years and been married almost 3. One would think since i have been around so long that there would be no major problems!? Well, at least thats what I tell myself or maybe it's more of a hope.
My SD is now 10 and my SS is 13, i don't really have too much of a problem with my SS(except for when he gets in his i don't have to listen to a word you say mood, which is a few times a week), my SD on the other hand is a livng NIGHTMARE!! I say her name and she jumps up points in my face and starts screaming at me, seriously, WTF?!?! My BDs won't talk to her anymore and they are only 7, they tell her she is mean. You can't look at my SD or she will accuse you of staring and freak out, you can't tell her she's wrong because she never does anything wrong. So basically I am the joke when i try to talk to her she laughs in my face, does not respect my things or me. I don't believe in hitting children, I really don't think its solves anything but never in my life have I wanted to smack someone in the face so bad! I know its really bad to say, but i can not stand my SD. She makes everyone in my house miserable. I have bent over backwards for this child given her everything, i do more for her than her BM does! But I am still the bad one. My SD therapist blames it on me (Yes i had them put into therapy cause i couldnt take it anymore), their BM says it's cause she wants to live with me. NOw take into consideration that my SD BM has been in and out of jail numerous times, is a drug addict amd so on and so forth. So the court sais your unfit. The BM does not see it that way, she feels she is the best BM on the planet! So with her thinking that every year she takes my H to court or tries to anyway. She does not pay CS because she gets mad and say i have no money and turns the kids on their dad and makes them hate him. She is a dead beat BM, will not grow up, hardley sees the kids when the do visit with her. Now i have a psychiatrist who is telling me she has ODD (oppositinal defiant disorder), my sister tells me she is just a f*%&$@# brat! How do you tell the difference? Her BM also says she acts like this cause we spoil her. Now I don not spoil my BDs. I was raised in a very large family and was taught you have to earn what you want/get which is the way I teach now. I never recieved presents on a friday just for the hell of it, i got them on holidays and birthdays. My SD BM gives her whatever she wants when she sees her. One weekend it will be 3 pairs of shoes the next its something else and keeps going. As for my SS he gets nothing from her but a bad haircut. She favors one child more than the other but expects my H to just say its ok they can live with you. So for a person to say its our fault but they are the ones who are doing the spoiling because they are buying love, takes a lot of balls. Sadly, this is what she does she tries to buy their love and fill them with false hope like if you live with me you'll get this and have this and we'll do that and blah blah blah. This is funny cause for 2 years she has said oh i'll come visit you and see your school and she has never come. I feel my SD and SS are slowly killing me.
I think this site is great and am so happy I am not the only one who has problems with SK!