nengooseus's Blog
I feel just awful
My SS (nearly 12) has been a challenge for years. He was HCBM's perfect golden child until last year, so enmeshed that I was scared of him. SS16 moved in with us and HCBM got herself romantically involved with a couple down the street that has three kids of their own, and SS has truly become another of BM's casualties.
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New Heights of Crazy
Our HCBM loves drama and chaos. She always has. And she take the SKs right along with her, but I never imagined it would come to this....
SS16 (lives with us 70%) comes home from a visit to Mom's this weekend and tells us that his mom announced to him this weekend that she's in a polyamorous relationship with her bestie and Bestie's husband. She's part of a thruple!
I am... Gobsmacked. We suspected something was going on, but not this.
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They're driving me bonkers! (Vent)
SKs are both here for winter break. SS16 is here 70% normally and SS11 here 30% normally. Their mother is a HCBM to the extreme and has stunted these children to the point that there's no real personality there. They just skulk around and suck the joy out of the atmosphere.
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I'm so angry and frustrated!
DH, my bio-DD, and I have been at home/quaratined since mid-March because of the pandemic stuff. We've been *very* careful, mostly because DD's dad is MIA, so it's only us to care for her, and because of our own "healthy" health anxiety.
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Courts are working (where I am)
My lawyer just posted on Facebook that the courts are closed, but judges and clerks are working. As long as the paperwork is done and "agreed" by the parties, there shouldn't be delays. If not, we must be prepared to wait.
I know we have a few people here waiting for a judge to sign off on something, so I thought I would offer a sliver of hope!
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Rational or irrational fear?
I've come to realize that I'm afraid of SS10. Maybe afraid isn't the right word, but I feel very unsafe around him, and I'm trying to identify if it's rational or irrational fear that's driving it.
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I am literally LOLing
DH and BM are involved in (another) custody dispute. Today was a "settlement conference" with both lawyers and the GAL. Apparently, our attorney took the opportunity to chastize both DH and BM for being a$$holes and her observation was that after reading through the correspondence, it looks like *I'm* the only one with the kids' best interests in mind.
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MOTY
For the sake of background, our BM is an alienator. The kind where she doesn't explictly say anything against DH, but she makes it 100% clear what she thinks. She went so far as to have her now-XH file for cusotdy of the skids when she was deploying a couple of years ago. She also refuses to swap weekends when DH has to work and told SS (7 at the time, and who had been refusing visits because of her) that he only had to see dad for 480 minutes and has insisted that a 2 week vacation period equals 336 hours and not a minute more.
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Winter Break Drama
We dropped the skids back with their mother last night after 6 LONG days of drama.
Skids are both grounded at our house. SD14 started an Instagram account in the spring, but neglected to tell her dad about it. For 5.5 months. At the same time that she was telling him that she *couldn't* contact him at all because BM blocked him in her phone and to call she had to use BM's phone. And then we found her Insta account, by accident.
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DH being a jerk (Vent)
I know that my issues are getting "triggered," which is causing much of my frustration, but I'm so irritated by DH right now, I'd like to choke him out!
DH retired from the military a little over a year ago. He's working, everything's fine. We were in a pretty peaceful patch, other than the never-ending drama of BM and the SKIDS. We have EOWE Thurs-Monday, so a good chunk of time with them (much to my chagrin). It was *almost* getting to a peaceful point.
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