New Stepmother for over a year now and my patience is at its last straw already. I am 33yo with no children and my husband is 43yo with 3 children (2 of which were living with us) but us together alone we have no issues whatsoever as a couple (other then he can be a little to junky for my ODC neat freak self lol). Stepkids are as follows... Boy 18yo, Girl 17yo and another Girl 5yo (by a different mother then his ex wife). My husband was married for 10 years but physically together in same home for only about 6 yrs. I have never been married before now and I have only delt with respectful, well mannored, smaller children under 12 years of age.

Now with that being said, I dont even know where the heck to start with this long story but here it goes. . . few months back there was a big blow up with the two oldest kids and their father in which he kicked them both out. Arguing & lecturing goes on a lot in our home due to his 2 kids not wating to do anything but lay around. Well the 17yr old girl now lives over at my husbands 5yo little girl mothers home (which is perfectly ok with me other then she is a horrible influence on his 5yo and she is already having behavior issues in school) but the boy who is 18yo left for a couple days and then came back with all his "i'm sorry's" etc. My husband, due to his son's lifestyle and very poor choices he is always, in my opinion, giving in to his son to easy because he is afraid his son will get hurt/killed in the streets or get in even more trouble. He is already on probation for theft (from another state) and was supposed to complete a drug program and get his GED but has since been kick out of the drug program and only went to 1 week worth of classes, he has no desire to get a job and all he wants to do is hang out on the corner or with friends and smoke/drink. He lives in this "rap video" fantasy world and most of everything he that comes out of his mouth is the most ridiculous mess you have ever heard in your life. He is an admitted thief, he has broken into the house severel times and then lies about it (because of course he is not trusted with a key), when he is home, he has to be told to take trash out, will walk past the dogs mess in our back room, wont wash a dish but makes dishes (or his dad will tell him he need to clean up after himself and he will be a smart ass, in my opinion, and only wash his dish and leave others in sink), doesnt contribute a fricking thing, he has on a few occasions rung my door bell to get in the house past our 10 oclock door lock cutoff not to mention just this morning he rung the door waking us up at 5am (in which my husband gave him some blankets and told him he could sleep in the car). The list goes on and on with irresponsible crap. I do feel bad for my husband because all he is trying to do is protect his son and try to push him in the right direction but after a year of this mess I am on the verge of kicking them all out and saying "F" them all. I cannot handle blantant disrespect and all this pointless lecturing my husband does that goes in one ear and out the other. Something has to give. Any advice on how to not be so angry all the time and stress my husband out even more then he already is with my complaining about what his son does or doesnt do?? Any stories to share that might help me see things differently or from a new prospective.