I have no one to blame but myself either. Two weeks ago during a skid visit, DH confided in me about how worried he was about his son. There are a number of issues but after hearing him out my main conclusion was that the EOWE arrangement wasn't working out at all. I suggested that DH go back to following the CO and resume the 50/50 schedule for his son (but NOT his daughter...that's another story altogether).

I suggested that. I couldn't believe it even as the words were coming out of my mouth. Fortunately, DH is a very wise man. When he approached his son with the proposal, he was very careful with his words and suggested a vague "more time" rather than committing to the old 50/50 schedule. His son jumped at the offer without a moment of hesitation. He was so excited about it that he told his mom right away. She blew up of course. DH basically spent the past two weeks "negotiating" with her for time that is legally his in the first place. "Negotiating" as in the way you would do in a hostage crisis. She pulled all of her usual stunts and even threatened to withhold SS permanently. In the end, she knew she didn't have a leg to stand on and that technically, she had been violating the CO for an entire year already since it was "her decision" to go from 50/50 to EOWE. Lmao....yeah right, HER decision. DH played that one right. All of the written communications from that time clearly indicate that it was "her decision" and that decision looked an awful lot like a CP denying visitation to the NCP. }:) She ended up giving in when SS, sick of the harassment at home, said he would be happy just adding on a couple of week days to the EOWE visits with his dad. Win. He got his extra time but I didn't get stuck with the 50/50 hell I had originally suggested.

What was I thinking? Why did I suggest it? Mostly it was because I knew I wouldn't be able to live with DH if he was full of regrets about his kids. Some of it was out of concern for the kid himself. Both skids have always seemed socially stunted to me because of the terribly sheltered environment BM keeps them in but SS has gotten much worse over the past year. This all coincides with the reduction in time spent with his dad. As DH was talking about SS's home environment, I knew he was right, the kid is suffering and DH needs to take more control of the situation. I know this is the right thing for DH and SS. I just hope it doesn't take too big of a toll on me. Or my marriage.