So's son has not behaved at school at all this year. (kindergarten) He's been kicked out of class multiple times, suspended from latchkey for a week or more multiple times. In 5 month he has managed 3 days of green (good behavior in class)SO punishes him if he gets red or kicked out he gets time out all evening no toys no tv no playing, if it's yellow (less bad) 10 minutes in time out then gets all privileges, I've offered rewards for a week of green to both kids his dd almost always gets her reward (hair bow, temp tattoos that sort of thing) his ds has never gotten them said he doesn't care, doesn't care if SO throws away toys didn't care when Santa only brought socks and one small game, didn't care cause "at mommy's she just makes me sit with GP and watch tv when I'm bad"
So I had to watch the kids for a bit after school the other day and of course he got yellow, he doesn't get red as much now it's always yellow, I told him to stand in time out till his dad got home, he asked "is that all night?" Me: "no but at this point he may just be so sick of yellow that yellow will start to be all night."
He actually got upset and little tears, and I told him it would be up to his dad but wow there was a response, he cared.
SO came home and let him out of time out and was pissy he'd been in time out for 30 min instead of the normal 10, so I told him what had happened why he got yellow and his response to maybe having the same punishment for yellow as red. SO had a lightbulb moment, his kid could behave but was choosing to half ass it as 10 min was nothing to him. He told his son yellow will now be same as red it's all or nothing behave or get the same punishment regardless of color.
He got green on Tuesday, he got green yesterday, he's so excited o get green again today and pick dinner. Hot damn I'm excited for him too.
Now if only BM would do the same, but nope SO is cruel to punish him cause "he's only in kindergarten he can't be perfect."
At least if we can get him greens every other week they might not hold him back next year (teacher has said they will at the rate he's been and the level of problems, and they offer no help except speech at his school) I can't wait for the week he gets a Friday prize.