Updates on my rollercoaster life!
Welp good news first- moms club has new members- someold members left- so there has been a shift in the mom circles!!
The one mom i gravitated towards well we have ALOT in common!# its nice having that.
I talked to ss therapist about the name stuff- i hope she can get him to talk in a non-defenisive way- then we can have a family session with her. I told her no rush though. Just see how he feels, and we will go from there.
Ok bad crap- my husband is a horrible human being when he is sick!! Omg he was sick for over a week and i was ready to walk out! He was so mean, so clingy, ughh, everything i said or did was wrong!
I forced him to go to the e.r., because i was aboit to kill him!!
Once we found out he had pnemoina (thats why he was not getting better) and he got the right meds, and he felt better- omg i let him have it!#
I was so angry. That was over easter and he is trying to "makeup" for his crappy behaviour...
Im trying to forgive but i wont forget some of the awful things he said.
Im looking for my own therapist. I feel i need to get myself right, because im not sure i want to stay to much longer...
Well whatever. Im plugging along in life.
Oh i talked to ss therapist BEFORE dh deathly sickness, i almost feel like whats the point if im on my way out.
I dont want to fail at this marrage but i dont know if i could talke another week like that, its just not right to treat a yone like that.
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Here is why you are a good
Here is why you are a good wife (and please tell him this). I have an internet friend on the West Coast. Both she and her husband got some virus in late January. His hung on for a couple months. He emailed back and forth with his PCP and she prescribed inhalers etc. He had been laid off in December so Drs visits were difficult. One Sunday my friend was tired of this back and forth and he wasn't getting better. She said she was taking him to the ER. She went downstairs to take her daughter to her neighbours and went back upstairs to see her husband take his last breath. He died in hospital 6 hrs later. He had pneumonia and the build up had pressed against his heart and caused it to to stop beating. My friend is a widow at 41 (he was 54). This was at the end of February.
So please, point out to your husband that making everyone's life a misery may be the last thing he ever does. There are some nasty lethal bugs out there.
Besides him saying rude
Besides him saying rude things, what upset me was i suggest the e.r. earlier in the week, he decided to goto righttime(like a minute clinic) the "doctor" said his lungs sounded clear but his oxygen was low. His oxygen levels are low and does not request xray? Just gave him antibiotics. Thats it.
Well saturday he informs me he is coughing up blood. Not sure how long that was happening, but i was done after that and forced him to e.r.
I know someof him being nervous, and scared, is all the cancer scares in his family. They found his late uncles lung cancer from him getting sick.
But just because he is anxious about the xray, im supposed to ignore his mouth! so all that tension and rude crap should just be washed away because he was scared? I just cant, id never do or say somethings he said, just cause im sick.
That week and a half, really changed how i feel about him.
And yeah some of it was probably anxiety out burst, but he can't blame anxiety for the whole time.
I feel he crossed a line, and im not sure how to come back from it.
Ladystark, my hubby is a
Ladystark, my hubby is a grumpy bear when he's sick but has NEVER said awful things to me. Do you think that he actually meant them, deep down? I hope not. {{hugs}}