Christmas crazyness
So for any of you that read my earlier post on Christmas dilemma, I decided to buy a few gifts for SD (14) from me and told my husband he was responsible for her Santa gift and anything else (she is always ungrateful with the gifts I get so didn't want to be responsible). Well what do you know he didn't buy her not one gift.
this year she was supposed to be with us Christmas Eve 4pm- Christmas Day 12pm. So husband at 6pm yesterday is sitting on couch and texting SD asking if she is ready to go, she tells him "you need to talk to my mom about getting me". Come 8pm husband hasn't said anything to baby mom and SD. So I ask him what's going on, he says he isn't sure but maybe he won't get her.
so maybe I shouldn't have done this but I texted SD from his phone and said "no your mom needs to talk to me if she wants to switch times". Oh all hell broke loose. Husband mad I sent that message, baby mamma calling husband and me a million times. We were doing bedtime stuff with kids so neither of us see the calls until 8:30. Husband answers one and baby momma says he can't text SD stuff like that anything about days needs to go through her. I get a text saying "answer my calls".
so a couple things, maybe I shouldn't have text SD acting as dad? It just pisses me off the disrespectful attitude she has to her dad and he lets her get away with it!
baby momma, why is it ok for you to have SD tell husband "talk to my mom" but husband can't tell SD to tell baby momma to talk to dad?
baby momma tells husband if he tries to come get her she isn't going unless he brings the police.
I have always been civil with baby momma, never any fights, but to demand I answer her calls? I text her back saying I was busy with my kids and don't wanna get in middle of their issue. She says you have to be in middle your the step parent. Ugh no I told her no I can choose what i respond to and fights between husband and her will stay between them. Then she goes into how I need to treat SD like my own and blah blah blah. I told her good night!
I am now mad at husband because he didn't go get her, I know he didn't want to deal with the police but he shouldn't let her throw her tantrums and threaten just to get her way. And I think husband didn't get her because he had no gifts for SD! So that makes me mad because I wanted him to be responsible for her shit for once and nope he finds a way to avoid it.
so now here is Chrismas morning and husband and I aren't talking, really irks me this is how my Christmas is starting but I guess I'll just be grateful SD isn't here.
last thing, I want to return SDs gifts, she doesn't want to see us on Christmas then you don't get any gifts from us!
i hope everyone else has a better Christmas then we are having
- Kcbrown35's blog
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Comments
Sorry, but….. You were out of line.
As a step mom, and parent myself. I would be pissed at anyone doing this, to me, for me, or about me. You say you want your DH to handle his $hit, you didn't allow him to. Who cares why he didn't go. So instead of having an enjoyable Xmas with yours you've ruined it for all involved and for zero reward other than sd not being there. Which would have been a win anyways. You can't claim to not want to be involved when you boundary crash and it goes badly. You inserted yourself beyond "involvement "
This
I'd be furious had this been done to me and my kids. You are completely wrong to have sent that text so all the ensuing drama is on you. The BM is right...you are in it...right smack in the middle and you put yourself there.
Listen, we all make mistakes and missteps in StepHell. You're have some work to do with your DH. Think he's going to trust you near his phone again? Personally, I'd go to my husband and apologize and let him know I was wrong and that won't ever happen again. Then, if the issues with your SK are that bad, begin disengaging. Let your DH handle his kid and her visits. All on him and the BM.
Id disengage if in your situation
Ive disengaged in my situation. And last night before a big party, we had an argument and I was told that I cannot mention anything about Skids and their BS or I need to have divorce papers ready.
This sounds like a toxic situation. You should not have texted anything and you should really try not to feel responsible for your husbands lazy and lack of parenting. That is all on him.
Husband bought SD16 power sulk (shes nice as long as everything is going her way...and you dont disagree with her or you dont say things she wont like and you dont ask her to do anything...) an 800 dollar new pnone. And he did not buy anything for under the tree...my mom did all that! And I have no money because I had to pay bills.
Hopefully you gave DH divorce papers for his Christmas gift
today.
And last night before a big party, we had an argument and I was told that I cannot mention anything about Skids and their BS or I need to have divorce papers ready.
This is such a passive agressive ball-less coward move that I would have had the papers draw up and in his Stocking on the fire place mantle this AM and his bags packed and staged under the Christmas tree.
Then when he simpered and whinned about you fulfilling his request for divorce papers I would inform him that for the remainder of his testicle-less life his presence in your world is day to day and if he so much as grimmaces or even thinks about resurfacing this crap he is gone.
Grrrrrr!
Hopefully Santa brought your DH some balls for Christmas.
This ball-less wonder needs to develop some testicular fortitude.
How the hell did he procreate without testicles?
smh
If I were your DH, I would have the cops at BM's door every hand off and I would be slapping her with a Contempt motion baring her ass in front a Judge every time my kid was not surrendered or delivered for visitation at exactly the CO specified time.
Lather.... rinse.... repeat.
Good on you for loaning your DH some balls by replying to the manipulations by SD and BM.
Merry Christmas!!!!!!