SD wants me to be friend on Myspace

We just got done with our month summer visit from SD. She has been asking for a myspace account since she got here. I told her she was too young (9) and so did DH. She asked BM and she said it was ok. I made sure it was ok with DH and he said if BM said yes, then ok. I set it up for her b/c BM is an idiot and probably wouldn't be able to do it. Plus I wanted to make sure it was private and no body could look at it unless they where her friend. She only has 5 friends and 3 are older cousins on our side, an Uncle on our side and a friend from back home. She wanted pictures of her brother (our BS) which I didn't mind putting on there because I know she loves to show him off along with pictures of family and Daddy. (None of which I was in by her choice) The problem is that she wants me to be her friend. I'm not sure to tell her. I have my personal pictures of MY family that I don't care for BM to see. I know how nosey she is and she would be checking up and keeping tabs on me. I don't want to hurt her feelings, but I want to keep my life private from BM. What should I tell SD?

jen76's blog
Log in or register to post comments

Comments

Tough Dilemma

I too agree that 9 is pretty young to be on MySpace even with the privacy settings because even though her page is private a friend of a friend can view her page through the friends page or can they? I don't have a MySpace, but I have viewed many pages some of which are private just by knowing a friend and getting on through them. My Skids wanted a MySpace page and DH & I thought they were too young to have them. We later find out that BM said that they could have them so they had secret pages without our knowledge. Now that DH and I know about the secret pages they don't really go on too much anymore. I think BM only agreed because we said no rather than looking at the safety of the situation and the trouble that it can cause. I read and found some pretty racy things on the pages of some of their friends. BM is just too busy trying to be friend than parent. Funny thing is that her live-in BF had a page and stated that he was single and looking. She was soooooo furious when DH poked fun at the situation. In fact, she was down right embarrassed b/c he had some pretty racy pics of him and others (male & female) on his page and my thing is what if the kids wanted to be his friend and send him a post? Not a good image.

I say if you want to keep your page private, explain that to SD if you have a good relationship with her. You will be amazed at how well kids adapt and they appreciate you being honest with them. SO, I would probably explain that you don't mind being a MySpace friend, but there are some areas of your life and page that you want to remain private and that she and you can maybe IM each other or some other suggestion.

My new StepMother's Motto:

When life gives you lemons... Make a damn good Margarita.