He wants me to treat R as if he was my own. But then he doesn't want my input on how to raise him.

So how exactly do I go about doing that? It makes no sense to me.

If I were to treat R as if he were my own, then things would be very different in this house. BUT I CAN'T and any attempt that I make toward that "goal" is shot down immediately.

If he was my own, he would not have his license and be driving until he had a job and money to help with the driving expenses. This summer, he will be taking a summer school class and the way things stand now we will only have my husband's car and my car. I work 3rd shift and sleep during the day. So I am pretty sure that my husband will expect me to let R drive my car to class sense I will be sleeping most of the time anyway. When I put my foot down and say absolutely not, I will be accused of being selfish and self-centered.

I believe that R should not be allowed to be in his room alone with his girlfriend. Neither one of his parents seem to have an issue with this. SO, when his girlfriend gets knocked up and expects us to help with baby expenses. I will say gee, I think it's time that we re-examine how the money is distributed in this household. We need to split all the financial responsibilities and keep in mind that this girlfriend and her child are NOT my financial responsibility. You should have thought about that when you allowed your jobless son to do whatever he felt like to whoever he felt like.

Life's a Ball ain't it?