Sliding Downhill
So SS19 was refused enlistment in the Army so now he's stuck in my home. This week it became OK to tell me to get f*&^ed when I tell them to pick up trash, do chores, etc. I know the problem lies with DW. Is there a solution other than leaving? I talked to a lawyer a couple days ago, DW doesn't know. I won't owe DW a dime. I'm pushing 50 and I want to live. I can't waste more days on these useless children. They used to be great when DW wasn't around, now they are just full-time jerks. DW has given in to all demands. I need a solution other than something extreme.
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Comments
Why should you be the one to
Why should you be the one to leave?
You and your wife need to get on the same page and give the 19 year old a deadline in which to get out.
Since he didn't enlist in the Army, does he have a job, going to school, what?
For reasons unknown to me, DW
For reasons unknown to me, DW has made it clear she won't pay for any more college for SS19 so school is out of the question. He has a part-time job at a chain restaurant. I want to give him a deadline because he is becoming a bigger jerk everyday. It's a topic I have grown fatigued with.
I had a long and very
I had a long and very successful career in the military and I know that he wouldn't have completed a term with the Army or any branch of service. Sooner or later his integrity problems would have become evident. But at that point I probably could have him sent to live with BD.
Have you tried counseling
Have you tried counseling with your wife. She may need more help letting her baby bird out of the nest.
Refuse to enlist? Lol. Well I
Refuse to enlist? Lol. Well I would hope that if that's something he didn't want to do, he wouldn't. Nor should be made to.
But he should be given a deadline for sure. My siblings and I are dealing with this with our 19 year old brother.
I gave him a deadline he didn't follow and kicked him out. He managed to sucker another sister and now she's sick of his shit and wants him to follow her deadline.
Unfortunately you've gotta push and nag. Make his life there hell to where he WOULDNT want to be there anymore.
He needs to get a job and get his own place. That's his only priority.
Maybe I wasn't completely
Maybe I wasn't completely clear. SS19 wanted to join Army, but they won't take him. He was overweight. He's not doing anything to fix that.
And yes I'm trying to make
And yes I'm trying to make his life difficult but he runs to DW and then we have a huge argument.
Did the military refuse him?
Did the military refuse him? That is not good at all. Do you know why? Like the others said try counseling. I had to offer my dh an ultimatum when ss refused to launch. 17 years later ss still won't talk to me. Currently ss lives with his gf and bd at his mil's house. Lol I am so glad he left and became other people's dependent.
Good luck. Your commitment to the skid is over by one year.
The Army wouldn't take him.
The Army wouldn't take him. He was disqualified for being overweight. I guess I can try counseling but this has become such a sensitive topic in my house. Yes my commitment is over but I have to put with a lot of "you hate my kid" bull from DW.
Yes he could go back in 30
Yes he could go back in 30 days but since that time he's given up exercising and is actually getting larger. I didn't think a 19 y/o could get fat that quickly, but he's doing it.
There's no hope of OSS
There's no hope of OSS getting in the military and off of CS
1. his grades are mega low
2. he's probably at least 50 lbs overweight and climbing
3. he has the emotional stability level of Elmo
4. he's a grade A panty waste with delusions of being a rock star
Currently he just barely graduated HS with a 1.7 GPA and is working a few hours a week at the local eatery.