What happened to xmas?!!!!
For anyone who has not followed my blog, I met a wonderful man after being divorced 7 years - he has been widowed 5 years. We have lived together 8 months now, and my 3 children do not wamt to be living here.
His older son has moved into a flat with his girlfriend, so we are left in this new house with just his (nearly 17 yr old & my nearly 15 yr old) daughters.
I love my kids dearly, I never thought they would live another life, but miss them so much - I thought they would be here with us when we moved. I found that I spent xmas, 2 hrs early morning with my own kids at their Dad's in the morning, then came back to 'our house.'
His son and daughter , who live with us, never even gave me so much as a xmas card. I sat there, totally humiliatated whilst I watched everyone exchange presents. Even the present to his son's girlfriend was given in the name my fiancee & his daughter!. They just 'forgot' about me!
Yet still my fiance is making excuses! It is never their fault, I am looking for problems!
What can I do to show him the hurt I am feeling!
I could cope with this if I thought that he was on my side. But, to be honest, I don't think he is, or will be.
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Comments
Some people are blind until
Some people are blind until you knock them upside the head with the truth. All I can say is stand your ground. You were left out, & that isn't right... it's just plain rude if not mean too. If things don't change & he refuses to see your side of it you might want to think about moving on, because it's not going to get any better.
I also wonder why your kids don't want to be there. Are they seeing something you're not?
Hipi
When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.
I sympathize
Every year my husband gives SD14 money to buy presents. She buys for her father and her two half-sisters (our bio-kids ages 4 and 1). And nothing for me. This has happened every year since the first year we were married. I just bite my tongue and don't say anything. I would rather get nothing from her than get something grudging that she only bought because my husband pushed her. (But I am frustrated that he doesn't think enough of me to make sure she buys me a present. Does that make sense?)
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To Most Evil
I have finally given up and gone this route as well. I used to spend all kinds of time thinking about what SD might like and tracking it down. Gifts, stocking stuffers, etc. Finally, last year, when everything I gave her remained unopened (and still is) on the floor in her bedroom, I decided enough was enough.
This year I got her ... Nothing. I don't think she even noticed. Or maybe she was glad. It makes me even more evil in her sight. But I no longer care. I've been worn down.
P.S. Same situation with gifts from my family. My parents and siblings always make a point of recognizing special events (birthdays, Xmas, etc.) for SD. She never uses what they give her, including gift cards. They are at their wits' ends because they don't want to alienate her, but they are tired of wasting money. My husband doesn't want me to return the gifts to my family because once they are given to SD they belong to her. But she puts them in the basement (where storage is) and never uses them.
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