I'm having a nervous breakdown!!!
DH is going to court this morning for all of the child abuse allegations..... for a quick update.... my 2 year old SS came home from BM's house with a black and blue butt.... the baby was abused. I don't know if BM did it.... but I do know that it happened over there. Long story short the 2 SKs were taken from my DH and I and BM while CPS and law enforcement tried to determine where the injuries occured. On April 19, 2007 the Protective Custody order was lifted against all of us.... on April 20, 2007 BM obtained a Temporary Order for Protection againt DH (we have not seen the kids since) and today he in the hearing RIGHT NOW!!! I am so scared and nervous and I don't even know.... BM has no evidence against us... the only evidence is the fact that we (meaning I) took SS to the doctor (whom filed the cps report), we took pictures of the injuries, and my SS told CPS and law enforcement that BM hit him with a belt.... I know she has nothing but I am still scared to death!!!
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It will be okay
Take a moment and breath sweetie... I cannot imagine being accused of such, but if the SS stated that BM did it, then it will work out. My SD's BM accused my husband of sexual abuse. My SD had to go through all of the medical exams, speaking with counselors galore. There was no evidence of anything. When that didn't work, she accused him of physical abuse. Again completely unsubstantiated. WHen my SD got ringworm at BM house, BM claimed it happen at ours. AGAIN, CPS found no claim. After going before the judge, he decided that we needed custody, and ordered the mom to stop with the false accusations, or he would hold her in contempt. SO, I am sure the judge will see who is at fault. In te meantime, I will be praying for you.
Thank you so much
I am still waiting to hear from DH... the hearing was scheduled at 9am and its 9:50am now.... I am having a hard time breathing.... I am scared.... Thank you for your kind words.... I'm praticing "belly breathing".... I'm at work... my heart jumps everytime the phone rings.... I'll update as soon as I hear from DH.
:(
Oh, girl, I am SO sorry. I have a 2-year-old too so this kind of hits home for me. It's so sad and to think that YOU were the ones being responsible and getting the medical attention, and then were treated like criminals...it really makes me shake my head. I'm thinking of you and anxiously awaiting the GOOD NEWS I am sure will come!!
Hugs!!
Krissy
"erring on the side of caution"
is what the Commissioner told DH when she granted BM the order (pending an investigation by Family Court Servies).
I'm in shock.... I'll have to post later.... I can't even function right now....
OMG, I am so sorry!!!
That's horrible. Sending wishes and prayers that it will be resolved in your favor quickly!
Relax woman.....looks like
Relax woman.....looks like it's in the favor of you guys. Since SS reported that BM hit him, that is evidence against BM. That is a good thing for you guys, maybe now the court will rule that ss resides with you guys. Keep us posted.
-happy mom
I didn't really think of it that way....
Family Court Services will be conducting an investigation... So that is a good thing.... and in the meantime we are asking for a Revision of the Commissioner's ruling... That just means that we will ask a Judge to review the Commissioner's ruling and make his or her own ruling. We are all for the investigation.... but what we are not for is the kids being kept from us in the meantime.... we already haven't seen them in nearly 1 month and we have joint custody.... It hurts a lot.... I do understand caution being taken in a case like this and it the political aspect of it all... the sensitivity and the need for the court to feel that they are taking every precaution.... and I can understand their line of thinking.... it just really sucks for us in the meantime.... This may sound stupid but I do have faith that this will all work out in the end... like I told my DH, the BM won a small battle today... but the war is FAR from over....
Nonetheless.... my emotions are all over the place and I sure that things will be fine one minute and then questioning everything the next... I am trying to be strong for DH and reassuring for him.... but I am scared and any thoughts from outsiders perspectives (all of you) is truly appreciated. If anyone has been in a similar situation please let me know what happened!!
Thank you all so much for your support... This is the most difficult thing I have even been through.
What I don't get
is how "eering on the side of caution" is what is going on when SS plainly stated that BM did it to him. When you took pics, did it have a time stamp on it? To prove when they were taken? I am shocked at how CPS can justify putting a child with someone who he said beat him. How does that even make sense? Since you have joint custody, is there an order in place roght now that says you can't visit SS?
IF IT WAS EASY, EVERYONE WOULD DO IT.
Just a minor set back
Judges can be ridiculous. It makes you wonder if they have a family or a heart. But just know that you are not alone. We had sole custody of my SD while BM was in jail for drugs. After her release, the judge decided that she deserved equal time, so we lost full custody to a drug addict / known prostitute. It was devastating, the knots in my stomach were almost too much to bare. And it seemed like I was going to dehydrate from all the tears. My SD would come home telling us horror stories of men with her mom, her mom not being able to wake up, staying at her grandparents for a week or mom because BM was MIA. Several months went by while a Guardian Ad Litem was supposed to determine our fate. But six months later, the mom violated probation and when to prison for years. We now have our sole custody back. Moral is ... A mom that hurts a child in any form is a fuck up, period. She will not be able to maintain forever. The investigation will produce evidence and in the end, the child will end up in the right home. This is just a painful hurdle that you guys have to cross. Your SS will be with you soon. Stay strong and know that it doesn't feel okay now, but it will be. Thanks for being a step mom that truly loves her step child. Your husband and SS are blessed to have you.