SD15 Wants Birthcontrol.....
SD called me last night and told me that she wants to get put on birthcontrol.... but not because she wants to have sex, she says it's to help with her periods. I asked her if she talked to BM about it and she said that yes, she tried but that BM freaked out and started yelling, etc. She asked if I would take her. I told her that no, I couldn't take her without one of her parents permission, so we agreed that her & I would talk to her dad this weekend when she came back to our house.
Here's my thought on this..... SD has been caught drinking and sneaking around. I've already talked with FDH about the possibility of her having sex soon if things didn't change. (ie: step up and be a parent and give some consequences for her behavior). SD and I get along great, and I will say that she comes to me about alot of things and also listens to me. She and my DD16 get along great and SD is aware of some of the things that have happened with DD. Anyway, I'm pretty sure if we talk with FDH about getting birth control, he will also 'freak out', but I also think that he will look at it in the sense that it's better to do this, than become a grandparent right now!!!
Has anyone else had this situation and how did you talk to the 'Real' parent(s) to explain to them that this is a GOOD thing that their daughter is coming to them for this...... at least it shows some responsible behavior?!?!
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Comments
Good for you to have a mature
Good for you to have a mature attitude about it. I hope your DH will agree to let her get on BC. If she wants to have sex she will, with or without BC. Asking for it shows maturity and responsibility and it would be awful if the lesson she learned from this was that being mature and responsible gets her nothing but being yelled at.
Thank you!!! That is my
Thank you!!! That is my point of view on it...whether or not she is being truthful and it really is her for periods or she wants to have sex... if BM is going to just yell at her, then she will never go to her again for anything for fear of being yelled at and judged as a 'bad' girl.
Talking to the father about
Talking to the father about sex and his little girl is always going to end badly. I think it is great that she wants to be on birth control and even better that she came to you. When talking to dad build up the benefits of birth control in regards to her period. I know that when I went on it, I stoped having cramps, which were very painful for me. Also my period got lighter. If your SD has any of these problems with her period then the pill can become a god sent, I wish I would have went on it sooner for those reasons. It was almost like the birth control part of it was just an extra bonus.
So it sounds to me like she
So it sounds to me like she hasn't even seen a Dr. yet and has decided for herself that being on BC will help her painful periods?? Something's not right in Dodge...I could see if she already went to the Dr. and the Dr. recommended this treatment after testing her for Endo or other possible conditions, but her coming up with this on her own is a little fishy to me... more like something her little drinking sneaking around buddies have told her. Hate to say it, but I agree with BM here.
No she hasn't seen a Dr.
No she hasn't seen a Dr. yet..... she knows that my DD got on BC at 15 because of how bad her periods were, but before I did that, I took her to a Dr. and we tried a couple of different things prior to her getting BC. I think the problem is, SD also has a couple of friends who are on BC and she hears them say that it worked to shorten & lighten up the periods, so now she wants on it too. Do I think she is planning to have sex??? Yes, probably, maybe not right away, but within a few months of getting BC. I guess I look at it in the way of, better for her to go on BC, than to become a teen mom who isn't ready.