MIL has been a wonderful person. Her heart is always in the right place even though she can be forgetful, an airhead and non-punctual at times. (Which are attributes that have always been a pet peeve of mine) If you've read some of my previous blogs my MIL has a "special bond" with my SD12 and my SS10. Quick overview is that she raised them for a time when their BM was getting in trouble for drugs and their dad was overseas in Iraq. Of the 8 grandchildren she has these two are her special ones. Now the problem isn't with my SD and my MIL. It's my SS and my MIL. He's a good kid, and with constant supervision he gets A's and B's in school. I feel like I have to ride him constantly to get his chores done and no matter how hard I try to let things go I just can't. I'm probably OCD and that is a character flaw of mine, but I have worked hard to get some of the things we have and I would like to keep them nice for a while, and I have standards when it comes to cleaning. He's a lot like his grandma in the aspect of being forgetful and sort of an air head. For the last 3 years I've been in their lives. I'm not perfect, no one is. But I can't help but feel like I'm resenting this kid. I keep telling myself that even though the situation with their BM was 7 or 8 years ago and that my MIL hasn't had to raise them for 5 or 6 years now that they will always have that "special bond". But I feel like she needs to let go a little now. For instance, we unfortunately live right next door to my MIL and every time my SS gets a free moment he wants to spend it with her. He never wants to spend it with us. We have to almost force him to go places with us or help us do things around the house or even just spend time with us. It's almost like the only time he wants to spend time with us is when we rent movies. It irks me that he holds his grandma on this pedestal. The resentment has been building toward my SS for a long time now. I cringe on the inside when he kisses me good-night, I don't like him to touch me, hang on me, or hold my hand. It's gotten to the point where I don't even want to hear his voice. I'm angry toward him a lot. I don't know if it's because of this bond that he has with his grandma or not. But it upsets me because she's always asking if he can go places with her and do things with her and not my SD. Granted my SD is starting to get to the age where she doesn't want to do some of the stuff her grandma is asking if my SS can do but I mean really? She can't treat them equal? My mom made an observation to me this morning about what she thinks I need to do. She told me that I need to establish my "motherhood territory" with my SS. For example: any time she comes over to our house I need to lavish affection and love on my SS and not let him sit by her or anything like that so my MIL will see that I'm stepping up as a mom to him and that she needs to back off. Problem is I don't want any physical contact with this kid but it pisses me off when he hangs all over her. Is it time for me to find someone to talk to? Or am I blowing this way out of porportion? I've generally had an excellent relationship with my MIL but I'm starting to feel myself pull away from her because of these feelings I have. I just want her to back off from him and quit coddling him. I find myself calling him a sissy in my head and being disgusted with his behavior when he acts like a girl over something that I'm more of a man at doing than he can. His lack of not even trying to do things is enough to make my head pop off at times. Constant anger I don't know how to get rid of and I don't know how to let things go very easy. It's overtook the person I used to be. My husband even says I'm always pissed off at something. I just don't know what to do anymore. Any input would be appreciated.