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update self centered BM

anbacc's picture

So after church we went to pizza hut and SD11 ask DH why he was so sure she won't go live with BM. He says he not sure and that she doesn't need to worry about grown up issues. He ask her why she make it appear to BM that our home is so horrible. SD claim she don't and that BM just assumed it. DH then tells SD that she allows her mom to think that way because she doesn't tell her it's not true. SD says that she has tried to tell BM that SM not a bad person but BM doesn't want to hear it because she doesn't like SM. SD then claims she heard me yelling at BM and cursing on the phone. (BM and I did get into it on the phone over a year ago while SD was visiting BM) DH ask how she heard that because BM claimed SD wasn't around. SD sticks to her guns and says she did hear it. DH tells her, than you must of heard your mom cursing at SM as well and SD says no, she only heard me. So I tell her than she isn't being truthful because both of us said some bad things and that BM had lied to us then since she said SD daughter wasn't around. Thats when SD changes her story and says she was in her room but could hear it. So I asked how she could hear me if she was in her room. Thats when we get the truth. SD says the BM was in kitchen which is right next to SD room. Bm had the phone on speaker! Sd then says she thinks her mom did it on purpose so SD could see what a horrible person I am. After hearing this DH ask SD again if she heard her mother cursing and she finally admitted that we both did. SD tells me that BM is angry at me because of this and thinks I should apologize to BM. I tell SD that I did try to apologize half a year ago and said that we were both wrong and could we please put all this behind us for SD sake. Bm tells me no that she doesn't care about my apology and it's too late.
After SD heard this she said thats not right, that you should always accept an apology and forgive and that BM did not tell her that part.

It's just sad that even SD knew BM had phone on speaker to make me look bad. This woman is a piece of work.

Comments

sadstepmom26's picture

over a year later and they're still holding on to this? Thats crazy. SD should have never even been brought into this situation by BM.

anbacc's picture

Thats exactly what we have been saying but BM still continues to bring SD in to all this mess. She believes SD is old enough to understand all of this court crap. The truth is, yes SD is more mature than most 11 year olds but she still don't understand all of this and wont until she is an adult and has experienced things for herself.
SD is always asking us about all of this and about why BM left, begging us for the truth, but we refuse to do that to her. We have promised that when she is old enough and still wants to know, we will gladly sit down and tell her everything. I hope she remembers that we at least tried to shelter her from the craziness.