They're not my kids!!
Going to counseling and DH keeps asking, "Is it normal that she doesn't consider them her kids, too?" HELLO! They are NOT my kids! When is he going to get this? His 3 kids do not constitute me having my own. Sorry for being selfish, but I still want my own kid, almost as much as I want to see skids' BM burn at the stake for being the horrible witch of a mother that she is.
- Amy Lynn's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
What did the counselor say?
What did the counselor say?
She said "we don't use the
She said "we don't use the word normal in here. What you think is normal will not be what she thinks is normal. Normalcy is a relative term". I really wanted to thank her for the definition of normal as I dropped my $40 co-pay.
I had to tell my DH "I did
I had to tell my DH "I did NOT get an orgasm out of making them" before he understood.
I say this to SO all the
I say this to SO all the time. I wasn't there when they were conceived, I did not carry them for nine months, I did not push them out which means *they are not my kids*. Will I care for them? Sure (because I love their father and so choose to try and accept the skids). Do I have to love them? Not at all.
Notasm: This is probably the
Notasm: This is probably the best advice I have ever been given. ROFL. Next time, I'll send you a check for the $40 co-pay.
My SO thinks I should bond
My SO thinks I should bond more with his daughters, ages 19 and 24. Yea right! If there was ever a chance he nixed it by having 2 separate lives for the first 5 years we were together, his life with his kids (every weekend) and his life with me (5 days during the week).
I tried the bonding thing. It
I tried the bonding thing. It didn't work. BM got jealous, said SD10 wasn't my child and then cried in front of SD10 saying I was trying to replace BM by calling myself a parent. Now I do nothing. I will never call myself one of her "parents" again, even when the extra-curricular form needed a signature, and I was the one there.
This is the main reason the
This is the main reason the step mom is considered evil. Her Dh has way too high expectations of the sm and the bm is screaming that sm is nothing to the kids sm is stuck!
So if husbands would back off and realize that the kids aren't the SMS and they haven't been able to bond with the kids like he has and let the relationship flow the way on its own all family members would be happier. You can't force someone to feel the same that you do about anyone or anything.
Plus tell ex to shut up!
I haven't spoken to or seen
I haven't spoken to or seen her in 6 months. I refuse to engage unless DH has enough money to bail me out of jail after I throat punch the bitch.
My DH, like many others, had
My DH, like many others, had those delusions at the beginning, too. I had one son, he had two daughters and a son. I actually do better with the girls! I have tried with SS, but 1) he is a momma's boy, and therefore, very loyal to her, and 2) he is everything I don't want my son to be. DH gave up the whole "our kids" notion very quickly.
I think it is much easier for a man to step into the dad role than it is for a woman to step into the mom role. Moms need that bonding that comes from carrying for nine months, or getting up with the late night feedings, etc. that come with being a mom. That's my opinion, anyway.
It's amazing how some of
It's amazing how some of these dh's live in fantasy land. They are NOT our kids and NEVER WILL BE! We can care about them, look after them and in some cases even love them but they're not ours. And for those dealing with bratty, ungrateful, entitled skids why in the hell should we be expected to even like them, never mind love them! As many have said, we didn't conceive, carry and give birth to them and as much as I might care about my ss's and want to see them grow up well, I do not love them like a mother does and never will. The feelings I have for ss's is no comparison to what I feel for my now grown-up DD, and I think anyone who says they love their skids as their own are in the minority. It's great if they do, but for those who do not it's perfectly natural and understandable and no one should be made to feel that it's expected or they're a failure for not sharing the bio parents unconditional love. My skids live with us and I see my role as one of supporting DH to parent his kids, rather than acting like a parent myself. He seems quite happy with this and appreciates me for what I do. I wonder how many of us who have bio kids and dh's who expect us to be replacement mothers to their bios can honestly say they love our bio kids as their own? I reckon not many!