You are here

Oh No! What will I do?

3LittleDragonflies's picture

Submitted by 3LittleDragonflies on Wed, 10/09/2013 - 7:45pm

DH just pointed out that if the test comes back that SD isn't his, I will no longer be a stepmother... which means no more StepTalk...

:jawdrop:

But... but... Sad

NEVERMIND! I changed my mind! Undo the test!!! DON'T TAKE AWAY MY STEPTALK!!!!

Wink

Comments

3LittleDragonflies's picture

Submitted by 3LittleDragonflies on Wed, 10/09/2013 - 8:24pm

The Plan
Meet with BM in a public place
Present 2 options:
1) Do not have SD’s legal father changed and we will make her life hell for the next 14 ½ years
2) Change SD’s legal father quietly with only him, GBM, BM, and us knowing.
a. With this, we can either remain a small part of SD’s life OR
b. We fade into nonexistence and DH becomes just Uncle B’s friend.
If she decides on option 1, she is facing:
1) We will apply for 50% custody and be rigid with enforcing our time
2) We will let EVERYONE know DH is not biologically SD’s father
a. B (her brother and DH's best friend... he's defended her for years and will go nuts on her if it turns out SD isn't DH's BD)
b. Teachers
c. Friends
d. Family
e. Coworkers
3) We will sue in civil court for paternity fraud and have every last dime of child support returned to us… with interest
4) We will take it to court again, and again, and again.
5) We will file a restraining order against BM
6) We will immediately go no contact outside of email and insist on OFW being used

That's what we're going to threaten her with at least. I'm a very nice person until you screw with someone I love... then I am your personal ticket to hell.

Anon2009's picture

Submitted by Anon2009 on Wed, 10/09/2013 - 9:12pm

If you find out she isn't DH's, before you do anything, DH needs to talk to MI's Department of Human Services. I just went to their website and they have a link for establishing paternity, but have nothing for disestablishing paternity. They may have some info that could really help him, and that none of us know about. And he needs to get a free case evaluation from an attorney. Hopefully, the links below will help you.

http://courts.mi.gov/Administration/SCAO/OfficesPrograms/FOC/Documents/M...
https://secure.freeadvice.com/__forms_all/generic/landing-nogeo.php

Honestly, I don't think DH should give BM any options if SD isn't his. I don't know if he should even meet with her. If SD isn't his he needs to file to disestablish paternity with the results as proof. If SD isn't his, and BM has put everyone through this for the last 3 years, she should have to track down the biodad and get him for CS. She should have to deal with the consequences of her actions if she truly knew DH wasn't/isn't the biodad.
Nobody, man or woman, should have to pay CS for a child who is not theirs. If she is not his, he can and should leave her life now instead of following option #1. Just doing the second option may well be much better for everyone.