InNeedOfGuidance12's Blog
Christmas Realities
Earlier this week my Mom asked if we had SD14 Christmas Day. According to the CO we have noon Christmas until noon the next day this year. We alternate every year. I advised her, technically yes, but since SD, BM, and DH always change the CO on a whim to satisfy SD I would verify to make sure. When I brought up the question to DH it resulted in a minor fight where he became immediately defensive. He stated it was his time, she will be there why would I even ask.
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Thank you!
Just wanted to say thank you to everyone that commented on my last post. I deleted it because I feel like there was too much information in it that could possibly identify me.
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Merry Freaking Christmas Step World!
So, it's Christmas Eve & here I am in tears once again. So, we get together at my parent's house before Christmas Eve church service for dinner. My mother, Nana to my DD1 (almost 2) and niece, nothing to SD13 because she ignores my family, puts headphones in and watches Netflix when she's around them, buys all the kids their Christmas pajamas. My mother tries so embarrassingly hard with SD13. She always includes her, always goes out of her way to make her feel like family, never leaves her out. Before you say SD is 13-- she has been around my family since she was 5.
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Agitated
I know there are much bigger things going on in step world but this morning had been particularly frustrating! I get woken up by a cat being beaten to death--by that, I mean my SD12 singing at the top of her lungs with headphones in. The toilet paper roll is empty and not replaced (of course). My almost 2 year old DD was sleeping through DSL and she ruined it! Then I take DD down to get her milk and breakfast to find candy wrappers all over the table and an empty half gallon in the refrigerator. We had another full gallon.
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RANT from a disengaged SM
I have to post in the notes as my post is not posting.
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Seriously DH?!?
So my LO gets baptized tomorrow. DH won't be there due to work (we have a couple vacations planned & he doesn't get sick or vacation time.) DH also doesn't believe a baptism really matters until a person can chose it for themselves. We have SD this week (50/50 week on & week off all year long). DH asks me if I'm taking SD12 with me to church. I said I will if she wants to go as it is her little sister. He asks if I talked to her about it. My response; nope!
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Overheard conversations from a Disengaged SM
So I've been in the bathroom quite a bit tonight with a stomach bug. I can hear SD12 in her room with her cell phone on speaker. I hear her telling BM she's bored. (SD & BM unilaterally decided that SD wouldn't be attending summer camp, so basically she sits around all day doing nothing). She then tells BM that she's been putting herself to sleep early all week so that she can keep her iphone in her room. We have a rule in our house that all electronics come downstairs before bed so the kids aren't tempted to stay up all night texting, playing games etc.
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One Week Reflection
So I've taken the week and really thought about why DH and I have so many problems when it comes to BM and SD12. It feels like we've had issues at every turn--the super awesome custody crap, the subsequent 50/50 split, the failure to follow the custody order when SD doesn't want to, etc. this year alone SD has missed Thanksgiving & New Years Day even though they were our holidays in the custody order because DH refuses to enforce the order when SD would rather be with BM because she makes fun plans to entice her.
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Left out
With the nice weather I've been looking into fun things to do on the weekends. I have DD1 and SD12. One issue we keep having is BM and her family making plans for shopping trips on our weekends (we have 50/50 week on/week off.) Another is my DH picking up night shifts on weekends, which leaves me all day with DD1 & SD12, although lately it's been more of me & DD1 waiting for BM or BM's relative to drop SD off.
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School Attendance
A little background, we have 50/50 week on/week off custody with BM. We're having issues with SD12 going to school on BM's week. She has 15 absences, 2 of which are from an "educational trip" to the cabin that we take every year. The other 13 are all on BM's weeks. Aside from the issue that she needs to be on school, is the truancy issue. Absences this high require a doctors note for every absence or we will be referred to a magistrate judge for compulsory attendance issues. Has anyone ever dealt with this?
I don't want fined for absences we have no control over.
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