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LostInTheMess's Blog

Depleted, Defeated.....Done.......

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Submitted by LostInTheMess on Tue, 08/16/2011 - 10:35am

I am exhausted, emotionally and mentally exhausted. I do not know how to keep doing this. Disengaging a bit helps when SS is there, but now we are fighting over him when he isn't there......

Yesterday, SO participated in SS's counseling session - remember, he needed to go because it was not fair that he only had 1/3 of the closet when he is only with us something like 36% of the time. SO had promised that he would address the issues with the counselor - the lying, the manipulatio, the disrespect, and so on.

To Participate or Not To Participate - that is the question........

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Submitted by LostInTheMess on Thu, 08/11/2011 - 4:12pm

I have attempted the disengage. I have not perfected it yet, but the little I have been able to do has helped. I am less concerned with ss and therefore, less irritated by his behavior. So my current dilema is wether to particpate in a counseling session with ss and so.

The Court Battle

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Submitted by LostInTheMess on Wed, 08/03/2011 - 12:59pm

In response to BM's motion to modify child support and the recent CPS reports regarding BM's husband, we filed a cross motion to modify the parenting plan for primary custody or alternatively to the 50/50 BM had been giving SO for 2+ years.

We hired a GAL as well. GAL found that IF the abuse had stopped, then it was in SS best interest to have a 50/50 split - which is what he wanted.

Disengaging with a StepMonster

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Submitted by LostInTheMess on Mon, 08/01/2011 - 11:53am

How do you do it? I have tried and I just cannot seem to let it go when my ss is getting away with murder and breaking every single little rule, giving me dirty looks and then smiling ever so innocently at daddy. Add to it that my son is seeing the inequity when no one is holding ss accountable. (They are a year apart in age).

It's a lose/lose situation.

If I disengage, I think it's bad for my son.
If I engage, it's bad for my relationship.

Also, does anyone have any experience with disengaging actually strengthening the SM/SK relationship?