Feeling sad right now
background: CO says that BM claims Skids every year. She didn't make enough to claim them or to file taxes at all (I'm not sure which) last year so SO claimed them and gave BM $1000.
SO just text me that BM wants to do the same thing again this year. It makes me sad. I know he's doing it for the extra money and not to help BM but I hate it. I feel like after 5 years SO should be DH and WE should be doing our taxes together and if BM can't claim the kids, to effing bad.
SO text BM last Saturday and tried to coordinate to drop the kids off early on Sunday because we had them for 13 days and I needed a break. She never responded but now she needs something.
I'm shaking just writing this. I know it's stupid but I'm just tired...Tired of sharing my life with a women that only cares about what WE can do for her. I don't want to be cold with SO when he gets home tonight and I don't want to cry, I really need a break.
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*Hugs* You are right, after 5
*Hugs*
You are right, after 5 years the priority should be you and SO. Finances, taxes, all that should be totally separate between SO and BM by now.
But maybe this is something that your SO is ignorant of it hurting you? If he sees it as, a simple way of gaining a bit more cash and doesnt realise how it affects you then you guys need to be having a chat.
Well at least he's claiming
Well at least he's claiming them. My "SO" has three kids. For the last TEN YEARS he let the BM claim two and he claimed the oldest only. NO rotation as is standard operating procedure.
Now the oldest one is 18, out of the BM's house and living with an UNCLE. He's still paying massive CS for him and won't be able to claim him this year.
Meanwhile, the BM happily claims the youngest two as usual. My "SO" (Chef) gets ANGRY when I tell him he SHOULD at least claim the middle child and REFUSES to confront the BM on this.
And btw Chef doesn't bring home enough $$ after CS and taxes to pay even a THIRD of the bills.
I feel your pain! Run like the WIND, girlfriend!
So let me get this straight?
So let me get this straight? BM can not even file for a tax return, because she has no income. So if you're DH couldn't be bothered to claim SS, then BM would get nothing.
Who came up with the thousand dollar figure and why does BM get any of your DH tax return when she didn't pay taxes IN???
Sorry you are sad, but I'd be hot over this one.
I don't get it either. Every
I don't get it either. Every time we try to get her to keep the kids for a weekend or to bring them home a couple of hours early, she says that she has worked xx days in a row or that she's working a double. The kids tells us she is rarely home because she is working. She works as a bartender.
So either she is lying to us and kids about working and she is just partying or she is lying on her taxes and claiming all her tips. I have never worked as a server and I don't really know how it works during tax time.
I don't know who came up with the $1000 figure. Like I said, I know he's doing it for the extra money not necessarily to help BM, but right or wrong it makes me sad. I want to talk to SO about it but he can get defensive when it comes to issues with BM and I don't want to spend the weekend fighting, but he might understand where I'm coming from. Either way, I don't see him NOT claiming the kids because it's extra money.
I worked as a bartender and
I worked as a bartender and got more back on taxes than when working a steady 9 to 5. So I think you're onto something there.
My exH was a bartender and
My exH was a bartender and was able to file taxes every year. My guess is she is getting paid under the table and/or not claiming her tips and being unscrupulous and... then getting $1,000.00 handed to her by your DH... what a racket these scumbag BMs have!
Oh she would still get
Oh she would still get something. More than likely she would just allowing a family member or friend carry the kid, then split the refund with her. People around here call it selling kids. :sick:
*Hugs* I'm sorry, I know how
*Hugs* I'm sorry, I know how you feel. I'm with him...she needs to stay the hell out of our lives.
Maybe if you talk to SO about it; it will get better.
I'm sorry you're having a
I'm sorry you're having a hard time. I think you should definitely talk to your SO about your feelings on this.
I feel your pain. When DH and
I feel your pain. When DH and his BM got divorced, the CO stated she claimed OSD and he claimed YSD, which worked out fine until OSD was old enough to have a job and claim herself, then BM was mad that she didn't have a kid to claim, so, she started making sure DH never got any of YSD's medical bills (which according to CO, he's to pay half of those) then used the excuse "you don't pay the medical bills that you're supposed to so I'm claiming YSD on taxes", he just lets her have her own way, probably to avoid the medical bills, but it is slightly annoying because BM gets more back for taxes then DH would have to pay in medical bills every year.
Its crazy, SO is a pretty
Its crazy, SO is a pretty manly man but when it comes to BM it's like he loses his balls. If I was SO (after the shitty ways BM has treated SO, kids, and me for the last 5 years), I won't claim the kids just so that BM won't get anything.
That's how my DH is, some
That's how my DH is, some rules he has to follow because the court says so, some he follows just to be a good parent, but other rules are made up by BM and he refuses to fight back...mainly because it always ends up costing him more $ in the end. But yeah, I think BM got DH's balls in the divorce, along with everything else.
He claims them, but doesn't
He claims them, but doesn't give her any money. But, on a side note, don't be so ready to marry into this and do taxes together. I hate doing them with DH, because when BM sued us a few years back, DH's lawyers made us give our tax returns. Still pisses me off that BM saw what I make.
Now we have a year and half to go with SS turning 18 and then BM will never be able to see our taxes. DH knows that if she sues us again, that I will file separately.
Tax issue with DH and BM1:
Tax issue with DH and BM1: they were to claim alternately. BM let her BF at the time claim on DHs year. DH was ignorant to what he could do legally. DH had to pay back the money plus huge penalties because as soon as the boyfriend got that tax check he left BM and was no where to be found. DH just finished paying that off 2 years ago. He didn't get a tax check for numerous years because it went towards paying back the irs.
I'm far from a CPA. BM could be lying about her tips and not doing taxes to scam the government?
That's what I'm thinking.
That's what I'm thinking. She's lying to someone. Either she isn't working as much as she tells us and kids or she is lying about her tips. But she's gonna get $1000 back. I work my ass off and I'm only getting $1200 back this year. Between her job, CS, free medical and food stamps, she makes more than I do.
On a side note, you never
On a side note, you never want to get money back. You are actually losing money when you do this. Change your deductions and make it as close to even as you can.
THIS. I hear people tslking
THIS.
I hear people tslking about getting back 5, 7 or 10K and I think :jawdrop: .
Sounds like she's avoiding
Sounds like she's avoiding losing medical and food stamps. And using your SO to do it. She would get way more if she filed herself. I made quite a bit bartending and even waitressing.
Light bulb...I hadn't thought
Light bulb...I hadn't thought of that. I've never received resources from the state. Also, if SO ever gets the balls to take her back to court, the taxes will affect CS. No wonder she isn't filing...Damn she's a crazy genius.
Did your DH have a signed
Did your DH have a signed 8332?
Our BM did this, and DH had to submit over 5 years' worth of taxes (and SIGNED 8332's) to the IRS to prove he had the right to claim one child while she claimed the other.
After a few months, BM got nailed to the wall on overpaid taxes.
I have no idea
I have no idea
My DH's CO specifically
My DH's CO specifically stated that BM had to sign an 8332 every year for one of the SK's. Basically it's saying that although she is custodial, she is relinquishing the right to claim the child (and child's name/SSN is listed on the form).
*Hugs*. I would feel the
*Hugs*. I would feel the same...