Hi Pilgrim, I wasn't referring to the book, I'll have to look it up because I've never heard of it. They write books on this stuff, too?!?!?! It's funny that you mention BPD. I have read about a lot of topics since last year, wondering if it was just the grieving over BM's passing or something else. SD18 didn't get along with her BM, although DH says they were best friends. Bullsh*t. If everything is going SD18's way then everyone is her friend. If her father or I ask her to do something or if she has a different opinion on something, then we are the enemy. She has no friends to hang out with on a regular basis, says they don't call her. Wonder why?........DH asked SD18 if she called her friends because the phone works both ways, and she started crying and said no. I think she has ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder) and her father has told her she needs to handle her anger issues. Personally, I see this as her having trouble dealing with the stress of the world as well as her being used to having everything done for her. I just told her father to make sure that she took the trash downstairs from her bathroom for trash pick up tomorrow. Aunt Flo has been here for a week and she can't properly dispose of her used lady products. I have read ALL about that on here. SD18 will be 19 in a few weeks and she acts like a doofus. Yep, she tied up her trash bag bec her father and I were sitting right here across the hall and then promptly handed it to her sister SD12 to take downstairs for her. SMH. One day soon I'm just going to say, "No SD18 do it your f*cking self." Then the yelling, crying , whoa is me pity party will ensue.

I'll say it again.....54 more days until school starts. Bon Voyage Polly Prissy Pants, Bon Voyage. LOL *breathe* So F-ing ENTITLED. Karma........itsa comin'.

Thank you so much, Orange and TG. It's a holiday and I'm enjoying time in my room, lol. Orange, the Disengaging article was great. It appears I've been leaning in the right direction lately, getting small things accomplished by going through DH. I think the article said something about making sure communal areas were clean but leave their rooms alone. That is my biggest pet peeve, the communal areas. SD18 uses the kitchen and can't wipe down the counter, can't put things in the trash, and always seems like she's in a rush. To go WHERE? You sit on your ass 10 feet away from the kitchen in the living room on my nice leather couch all day. WHERE the f*ck are you OFF to? Except for the two days you work. I want to tell her father that it would be a good idea if she vacuumed and dusted the LR every week, as well as wash the throw blankets on the couch. She is always in there, curled up. Such a difficult life. She needs therapy desperately because she has poor self-image and seems to be very needy underneath what she seems to think is a tough exterior.

SD18 called DH this evening from uncle's pool party and said SD12 was being a grump. SD12 is never a grump. She didn't even go in the pool. DH reminded SD18 that there were PLENTY of times when she didn't feel good and DH had to pick her up from school. Once a month, if you get my drift. SD12 is being grumpy so I think Mother Nature is working her magic. She's new to this as she is just starting puberty. Gotta learn to have some willpower and keep your mouth shut when you don"t feel good. No one wants to hear your attitude because you have cramps. I told DH to make sure she took ibuprofen but she refused. DH didn't force it. I asked if she was coming down with something, lol. }:) Enjoy the ride, little one, and stay in your room. I'll let DH deal with Medusa Linda Blair SD12 tomorrow.

DH wanted me to help get the dogs out after I suggested we let them out early before fireworks. I said I couldn't because I was in my PJs and SD18 has her BF downstairs. DH is falling asleep next to me. I'll wake him soon so HE can make sure SD12 brushes her teeth and so he can give SD18 a time for her guest to leave. What do you bet he will only talk to SD12? IF he goes downstairs to find SD18 and her BF in the LR, I bet he will return only to say, "Oh they're just watching TV." That's great, Honey. Three other people live here. Set some boundaries for Princess and TELL her and her BF what time he needs to leave. I bet he won't do it. I just bet........

TY, Orange and Rags. These three aren't going to know what hit them when I step back even more. I have three chronic illnesses, yet I go to work every day. It's a long commute, an hour each way, and I ache from fibromyalgia. If I move too much it hurts, if I sit too much I stiffen up. I am trying to work on it with my doc by adjusting meds. I also have juvenile diabetes, so I am a voodoo doll, pricking fingers and taking shots all day long every time I eat. It's a way of life, it's been over 30 years since diagnosis, but I deal with it pretty well.

Funny Orange, how you say let the trash overflow until DH handles it. He won't even know it's overflowing in the girls' bathroom until one of them bitches about the other. Hey, that sounds like a good idea! Just last week SD18 bitched at SD12 for leaving an unwrapped pad in the trashcan for her to see. SD12 replied that it wasn't that time of month for her. SD18 looked confused and replied to SD12 that oh, it must be my pad in the trash then. **REALLY?** SD12 shared this with me after I found one in the powder room and disposed of the entire can. I asked DH to speak with SD18 about her hygiene but I know that didn't happen. That's why I had SD18 empty her trash herself yesterday, well, for the most part.

OK, so I need to stay out of the kitchen, don't even look in there, and let trash overflow. Oh dear God. I will use the kitchen for microwaving and coffee, but my time in there can be short. I will also make sure the dogs have fresh water because it's like asking someone to donate a limb to science if you ask them to top off the dog water.

I read up more on Borderline PD and it mentioned binge eating. I remember SD18 eating an entire mongoloid Hershey bar in one day last year. It's the big long bar that is like 5 bars in one. I would love to do that but I know better. I am 30lbs overweight and out of shape now, but I remember her unwrapping the last part of the bar and I exclaimed that "Wow, you've eaten the entire thing already?" Kid has no self control. Wait until she's older like us and wants chocolate. LMAO when it really IS NEEDED lol. During SD18s rant at me a week ago, I gently asked if speaking to someone about her deceased BM would help her. DH and I tried and tried last summer, and SD18 went to maybe 2 or 3 sessions right before fall classes started. All she talked about was what she ate and how she was keeping a food diary. She has very poor self esteem, but is built like an athlete, goes to the gym with her father and is in good shape. It's sad to say that no matter how nice your figure is, if you are ugly on the inside, no one will want to be around you. Anyway, when she was ranting I asked about more therapy for her and before I could finish the sentence she snapped her head in my direction, spitting fire and brimstone, saying she didn't need it. Hit the nail on the head there, huh? She then yelled at me (insert pity party here folks.....) that she went because she had an eating disorder. Well score one for SD18, "I'm so glad you got that cleared up in 2 sessions, my dear." I just shut up at the table and looked at her father, saying he could chime in at any time. He tries to be very gentle with her, to bring her calmly back down, because she flies off the handle so easily. He'll tell her she needs to take a breath and get a grip on her emotions and anger, all the while she just replies that she can't help it, crying and whining. Oh she's going to be SO disappointed when she is out in the real world. }:)

Rags, you say just not to tolerate anything from the kids, zero bullshit leash for SD18. If she were to start complaining that I DON'T do anything around here, do you think it best to say that I go to work 40 hrs a week (she does not because that would stress her out, she says...), I make sure that the entire family has medical through my employer, I balance the checkbook to make sure Daddy can take you to the beach for three nights so you will STFU? I have read that you don't need to give excuses to teens and I agree. So if she lays into me, I guess I would just say that I'm leaving the room because she is being disrespectful? Smile, and float away, ha ha? If I smile it will piss her off, but I don't have to listen to her shit.

I did nag too much last night at DH, trying to get him to let the dogs out before fireworks started and scared them. He wouldn't move. He texted SD12 to make sure she brushed her teeth and didn't talk to SD18 about what time BF was to leave. Turns out he left before 10pm, but DH just looked at me when I kept suggesting he go downstairs and give them a curfew. I finally drifter off to sleep, worrying that one of the dogs would pee in our bedroom. Good thing we lucked out on that one. Hubby had to let them out at midnight because bladders were close to running over at that point. Should've done it earlier. Oh get ready, cause here it comes dear. The poor guy isn't going to know what hit him when he has to handle everything. I don't even know if he put the trash out this morning. I can't see the curb from here. Stupid me, I texted him and asked him if he did. I'll try harder to lay back next time lol. }:) }:) }:)

Oh and another few things, lately I have been telling DH that he has never raised a teenager before. SD18 was 12 when BM divorced him. He never would've moved out except BM presented HIM with divorce papers. The kids still don't know that's how it went down. He would've stayed there forever for those kids, even in a bad relationship with BM. DH is a very glass half full, happy 98% of the time, kinda guy. BM had a drinking problem but still took good care of the house. She was just out every weekend drinking. When she got diagnosed with cancer, I can't say I blame her for living it up in her final months. She was also a control freak, which is where SD18 gets it from. Grandmother is nuts, too. BM had to start working when she divorced DH. Also SD18 got in an argument so badly with her BM about 6 weeks before she died that SD18 who was 17 and a senior in HS at the time, spit on her mother. Yes, spit on her mother! Nice for someone who is terminally ill, huh? DH always says that BM was a piece of work and that is why SD18 is the way she is, she always had to defend herself. SD18 is majorly F'ed up and doesn't even know it IMHO. Food for thought there huh?

Hubby just texted "No" he didn't put the trash out. My back hurts. LOL

Yes, SD18 has a job, she is SDstb19 later this month. Same job that she got the end of 11th grade, same job senior year and same job she has now after finishing a year in college. She is in food service, where most of us start as teens. My first job was McDs! She states that she can only work 2-3 days a week otherwise it will stress her out. LOL *snort* LOL }:) If she would only learn to look at her bank account, she would see that her savings has gone from 5k to 3k in a year. She just asks DH to transfer a little money into checking when she needs it. Now that she has started receiving summer paychecks, I told DH that we are NOT making her bank deposits for her anymore! DH made her download the app to her phone so she takes a picture of her check and it's deposited. She still hasn't ordered her textbook for her summer class which starts Monday. It's online so I guess it doesn't matter. A day late and a dollar short. I can't wait until she moves out. It will probably be another 5 or 6 years, unless I can make her life hell before then! BTW, SD12 slept until 1:30pm today. This is new for her. Puberty is here! I kept urging DH to go check on her and tell her to get her ass downstairs. Crap! I failed the "Disengaging Rules" again lol!! That's alright, SD12 will be up all night and be off kilter. DH said no worries, but come August 1st he will give SDstb13 a bedtime.

DH was texting SD12 from ACROSS THE HALL the other night, Rags, telling her to brush her teeth, but it works. Other times he goes and obnoxiously bangs on her door incessantly until she opens it, in a joking way, of course. It's weird for all of us to see SD12 entering puberty bec she isn't a girly girl, more towards the tomboy side. Last night I reminded DH (dammit there I go again lol) that SD12 needed a shower. SD12 takes one every other day. He said, No, SD12 could wait until Sunday morning. Well, it's Sunday morning......

Keep in mind that we all thought something was really wrong with SD12 when she didn't even go into the pool at her uncle's on the 4th. Instead, she passed out on a patio sofa in the sunroom and slept. SD18 took a pic. I would've thought she was drinking except she's only 12. Anyway, on the 4th DH finally let the pups out after all of the fireworks were done going off by the neighbors, so this was close to 1am on the 5th. This woke me up and I went to the restroom. On the way back to bed, I looked down the hall and saw the lights on in SD12s room. They quickly went out when she heard dogs and DH coming back up the stairs.

Yesterday, SD12 DID NOT GET UP UNTIL 1:30pm!!!!! This is not like her at all. This is the sweet, funny, good natured SD12 that I have had on my hip for the past year as a new SP. DH and I had gone out in the morning and returned with SD18 tanning herself, exclaiming that SD12 hadn't gotten up yet. I told DH to make sure she was still breathing because the lights weren't even on in her room at 1:30pm in the afternoon. Sometimes she'll just get up and play in there. He starts texting her from downstairs. I meet DH and SD18 at the kitchen table and start looking at his text msgs to SD12 with DH. I take his phone and text "Get down here now." DH texts "Brush your teeth." It's our mantra of the month for SD12, to brush her teeth. Last month it was "I forgot...." She finally comes downstairs to join everyone, thinking she's all cool, and has a bowl of cereal at 1:48pm. Enjoy your breakfast, dear. So the sweet kid we had is turning into a handful, all because of......

THE F*CKING INTERNET. THE F&((&(^%^$%#%#*&*&()-ING INTERNET. I hate it.

DH sets no boundaries for SD12 and now she is on her iPod Touch and iPad until all hours of the morning. It doesn't take a genius to know that's why she didn't get up until 1:30pm yesterday. She is engrossed with cartoons and harmless things for now, but it is ruining her sleep pattern. I usually wait until 11am on Sundays to start the laundry because the machine is right next to her room. It's an HE washer, which I hate, (don't ever get one, it doesn't save water and nothing gets really clean), and it sounds like a woman having sex when it runs. It moans and squeaks and shrieks. We all had ears up and eyes to the second floor the first time we heard it going, as we sat in the kitchen. Our washer is on the upstairs floor, fibromyalgia is thankful!

So, today I started laundry at 10am and the shrieking woman in the washing machine started doing her thing. The next phase is the slow spinning, which sounds like a headboard thumping, lol. Sounds like a hell of a good time. LMAO SD12 is still not awake and DH said yesterday that come August 1st he would enforce a bedtime. I think it should be done now since SD12 is turning from a cute kid into a shitbag overnight. She tried mouthing off to me a few months ago and I took all of her electronic devices, including the keyboard from the desktop and put them in a box in my car for a week. I wanted to keep everything with me for two weeks, and then she left a nasty note, so I made it 3 weeks. I laid into her about her smart mouth. DH saw to it that poor SD12 only had these items gone for 5 days and got them back the following weekend. A few weeks later, just like I had teased to her when she got bitchy, she got her first period. }:) }:) }:) }:) }:)

So, the internet is the enemy. Can't turn it off because Princess SD18 has to do her online studying. For one class. That she already took in HS. Whatever.

I should just call the provider and shut the entire thing down. But then how would I vent to you? LOL

Time to go start the shrieking woman with the next load of laundry. DH went to run errands. I suggested that he take SD18 since she could use a change of scenery. It worked. Ahhhhhhh.........

Do I let the kid sleep and be a shitbag when she gets up? I know what you all would say.....Let her sleep and let DH deal with her. OK. LOL

SD12 finally got up at 2:30pm today after DH went up and woke her up. She came downstairs in a foul mood. I said she was lying about what time she went to bed because she was online. I bitched her out good and DH got mad. She hasn't showered since Thursday. Good thing she doesn't stink much. I asked her a little while ago before shutting my door if she was going to shower "this week?" LOL I am just being mean to her now because she has been an ass all weekend. She had the nerve at dinner to say all we talked about was dogs and no one paid any attention to her. Here comes puberty. I said "Dogs are what make the world go 'round" and she just muttered smart shit under her breath. I let it go. I then stated that we talked to her about things she liked, like X, Y and Z. DH said "I talked to you about Z this morning." I said "No you didn't because she just got up at 2:30pm!" DH said "Buuuurrrrrrn!" to SD12. She didn't like that. We'll see how tomorrow goes.

TGIHB, I guess since SD16 is in her room all day, like mine, we don't have to worry about anything except for their breath when they finally come out, right? LOL It DID make for a quiet day!

~ Moon

I'm running errands today, but when I get home I won't use the garage door. Too much noise. I plan to sneak in the front door and see if she's up yet. As soon as she's up, she can eat, brush her nasty mouth and vacuum. Vacuum again. DH made her do it yesterday and there is still dog hair all through the dining room and foyer, piled up at the bottom step. Ugh. More later.

TGIHB, it's so funny you say that!!!! I just got back from running errands and I did a Ninja sneak in the front door. SDstb13 peers around from the bsmt stairwell and says "Oh you came in the front." I was nice and said, "Yes, to see if you were up yet." She said she had been up since 8:30am and I said that's what I like to hear. I asked if she brushed her teeth. She said she had. I asked her to get the vacuum out and go over every spot that she missed yesterday when she did it. She was agreeable even though she vaccumed for 15 mins yest and I have never asked for a do-over.

So she vacuums and I say that it's time for a shower, she's about due (insert sarcasm). She gives a nervous laugh and gets embarrassed and goes up to shower. Now, this is more like the Skid I remember from May before she started getting weird on DH and I (got her first period too). So, she finally makes it to the bathroom after 20 minutes of doing who knows what, and the water comes on. I get online here, right across the hall from her bathroom and I hear the water splashing around, etc., there is movement in the tub. Good sign. She showers about 15-20 minutes usually but its getting close to a half hour in there. Now you're wasting my water. I walk over to the door and knock and say its been 30 minutes, let's wrap it up. She answers from right on the other side of the door, "I can't hear you, it's really hard to hear you, I'm in the shower." Bullshit. There is no more splish-splashing in the shower, I can hear a steady uninterrupted spray of water just going. She isn't in the damn shower. I reply, "It sounds like you're on the other side of this door. What are you doing in there?" SDstb13: "I SAID I can't hear you, I'm IN the shower!" NO, you're NOT idiot, I think to myself. I reply back," It REALLY sounds like you're on the other side of the door and not in the shower." Giggling to myself now, trying to keep a steady voice as I speak to her. She replies, "I'm WASHING myself. I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!" LMAOOOOO from me in the hallway. OK, so then I hear a little "break" in the spray and not 10 seconds later, the water promptly is shut off.

She wasn't in there the entire time, she got out, at who knows what point, and she was standing in the bathroom. Left the water running in the shower!! I should've told her to put her sheets in there, too, if she was using that much water. I texted DH about how she was getting stranger each day. He said Yes, she is.

Later on in front of DH, I will ask her what she is doing in the bathroom, OUTSIDE of the shower while the water is still running. I will threaten that one of us will sit in there and make sure she showers for 15 minutes and then tell her time is up.

Kids are some different kind of F'ed up these days. She thinks she's so cool, practically overnight, and she's an idiot. So much for the angel DH and I used to have.

I thought of that Aniki, but I was so happy that she took a shower that I just knocked on the door and asked her nicely to hurry up. Oh, but wait, there's more that has just transpired.

Thank goodness, my DH is being supportive right now, because things just got a whole other kind of worse. I am crying and trying to calm down. Please help me with any suggestions because I lose any way this goes.....

My DH called and said another mom contacted him about taking SDstb13 to an event at school tonight. I took the phone up and knocked on SDs door, and she kept saying hold on. We were joking through the door and I was counting as her father waited on the phone. Then I asked if she was dressed and she said No. OK, 12yo kids do weird shit at that age so if she wants to sit naked, whatever. So DH on phone waited for her to get dressed. When she finally opened the door, it appeared she hadn't showered, or at least hadn't done ANYTHING while standing under the water?!?!? :jawdrop: Remember, at about 30 minutes in, I thought she wan't under the shower spray, but maybe it was the entire time??? I looked at her and said "Dad wants to know why you were in the shower for 30 minutes." We laughed and I handed the phone to her, thinking, my goodness, she didn't Fing shower?!?!?!?

She was done with her talk with Dad and I went back and knocked on her door. I called her father and put him on speaker phone so he could join the conversation. Not so nice this time. I asked her if she washed her hair? YES. No you didn't, it looks the same as before you got in there and it doesn't dry that fast. She screams at me, I scream at her, she says that she's going to have to hurt someone if this doesn't stop. I yelled back that she would end up in Juvie (Juvenile Det Ctr) if she hurt anyone. I yelled at her to SIT DOWN, and she planted her ass on the floor and then got up. Sit down, blah blah you get the idea, but it was a full-on pissing match with this kid!!!

She sounded just like her older sister SDstb19. DH and I prayed to God that this day would never come. The only time SDstb13 gets REALLY pissed is when she's been caught in a lie. I don't miss a detail. Her hair had not moved. She did nothing with it. Her father hung up and we continued yelling at each other. I asked her if it was so hard for her to shower every other day or to brush her teeth, to not be so disgusting?!?!?!?

I thought of poor Stepdown and her SD and asked her if it was so hard to wipe her ass, clean her vagina, was her sheets and then I yelled "Do you KNW what a yeast infection is?!?!?!? You're going to get one along with bed bugs because you haven't washed your sheets since the first week of June!!!

OK, so many of you have heard this before, you have lived it. The big thing for me is that SDstb13 was a sweet kid and she has turned into a liar and a disrespectful, moody snot OVERNIGHT. Didn't I just put at the beginning of this post 4 days ago that she was a good, funny kid? Well throw that shit out the fucking window? Who am I for trying to be nice?

DH and I texted and he is livid because he actually got to hear this shit from his little angel who is not growing a tail and carrying a pitchfork. We spoke and he is on my side, but......he has threatened that he and the 2 SDs may not go to the beach this weekend. I already told them I would stay home with the dogs because there is no way in hell, I would go "vacation" with those girls. It's not worth it. So when SDstb19 finds out, she is going to cry and throw a tantrum. If SDstb13 has to stay home with me then what break do I get? If they all stay home what break do I get? SDstb19 will throw a bigger tantrum than her little sister because she has no friends to go to the beach with. Also, we haven't paid for the room at the beach, we chose to pay at arrival, but I'm pretty sure it said no refund. I don't know how that works. Money isn't really the issue.

I told DH these kids have got to learn to respect me and help out around here. I suggested a chore board or something so they learn about work, being responsible, etc., and take some of the strain off of me. DH interjected Oh no! We're not sitting around, we're giving a dose of F YOU and you can go sit in your room for 4 days. With no electronics." I told you they were evil. I don't know what to do. I just told hubby that they can hate me all they want, I know I should've walked away from SDstb13 when I realized she didn't shower, but the disrespect is just horrible.

Here comes WW3......but finally DH is stepping up. All I want is for SDstb13 to shower and brush her fucking teeth, AND NOT LIE ABOUT IT.
I told DH I was done, tell them to leave me alone and treat me with respect. I'm done caring and I'm done having them sit on their lazy asses all day.

TY all....DH got home and SDstb13 had her still unbrushed, unwashed hair back in pigtails, which she never wears, in an attempt to look like she had cleaned herself. Her father calmly spoke for 15 minutes and we added little bits. He basically humiliated her and said he wouldn't tolerate dishonesty in his home. He stuck up for me and said he trusted me, that if I said something was "off" chances are I was correct. He said "Look at me, LOOK at me..." very calmly at one point. I reminded her that she is only 12 and she needs to respect her father, he is her biggest hero.

DH even brought up that she never cried when he mother died and that maybe some pushed down feelings were trying to come up. When I mentioned her BM she started saying, " Oh great, you're mentioning that mom died....AGAIN." Yet when DH said it, she listned and what he said was to the core. They will still be going to the beach (TY Jesus) but I suggested she have no gadgets iPod etc at the beach. For now, they are on the kitchen table. She has to stay in her room and lights out at 11pm until further notice. He also mentioned her snarky text to him this morning, when he asked if she was awake. She replied something like "YES, I AM AND IF YOU TRY TO TALK TO ME LATER AND I'M PULLING AWAY YOU'LL KNOW WHY," but it was more like she was telling her father what to do. I explained she should've just replied "Yes, been up since 8:30am Dad." So, she's lying there, too, and she still tried to say she took a shower. Immediately went off on me, so there was my sign again, nail hit on the head, she lied about the entire thing. DH had her like a deer in the headlights, but he is so frikkin calm. Well, he cussed at her on the phone before he got home and told her to put here electronics downstairs. He used the F word and everything. LOL

I thanked him for sticking up for me, now I just have to remember not to remind her to do anything. "Go ask your father, go ask your father...."

Yes, taking her door off the hinges would be a delight but then I'd have to smell her hampster and her sheets wafting up the hall.

OOOOH! Also, DH looked right at her and said he didn't like hearing her screaming like that at me (when I had him on the phone). He said you don't get to THAT level unless you're hiding something. Then he said, "I thought you sounded JUST. LIKE. SDstb19 when I heard you." I thought the same thing when she went off, she even said she was going to kill herself and then tried to blame it on me because I said "Go ahead, one less brat to deal with in the world." She tried to get DH points with THAT one and DH shot her down and put her in her place. Said it wasn't funny and asked if she knew any families where someone had killed themselves. Oh that shut her down quick. Because they DO know a friend's family where that happened. DH asked her how she thought they felt these days.

I'm tired. Whew. I love my DH for stepping up.

Hi All~ Such great advice and feedback. TY all so much! I'm happier tonight because its fair to say I completed my first full day of disengagement. SDstb19 got home from an overnight with a friend around 4pm and by the time I was home at 5:30pm the kitchen needed to be straightened. I left the dirty frying pan on the stove, left the recycling items on the counter when the can is one foot away through the wall in the garage, and left the trash overflowing in the can. SDstb13 has not been seen by me. I don't know what she told her sister about what happened yesterday when she was gone.

Hubby asked if we would have salmon tonight and I said I didn't really feel like cooking. He said OK, and then I added that I just didn't want to sit at the table with SDstb13, she's going to have to learn to treat me with respect. DH and I agreed that he would keep her elec devices for 10 days. He even changed the password on the computer and removed the wi-fi device from the computer so she couldn't log on anywhere. I am so pleased I can't believe it!!! I suggested that when the three of them go to the beach this weekend, that her devices stay here and that's when we both agreed on 10 days. I said that next time it would be 15 and then maybe we can empty her room of all of her things as you guys mentioned above. DH said "YEAH! I know a guy who did that with his son and IT WORKED." I told him this is up to him now, to bring these girls around, I'm not trying anymore but I will be there to support him. He said,"No worries, we got this!" FINALLY. After 1-1/2years of being sling-shot into a mother's role, breaking my back, and doing everything a mother SHOULD do to set a good example and provide for everyone.....FINALLY. I just thought it was what I was supposed to do, and then I realized I had no time, the house was hard to keep up with, we kept getting more dogs which I took care of. I always did the right thing by everybody. I can't go to the gym and workout because of neck, back and shoulder pain, I have trouble with balance when I walk...diabetes...I am nearly BROKEN and then I get to raise two kids.

I told DH a few months ago that I was the worst-off healthwise yet I tried more and did more while he watched sports and did what he wanted. He has come around and does the grocery shopping, has always done the yardwork, handled our rentals.....I just needed him to step up more with his own kids.

I looked up PMDD and wow that sounds familiar! SDstb13 has only had one cycle and isn't regular. I know her hormones are raging because she has been more irritable for the past few months, to say the least.

Time to let my dogs out and call it a day. Let's hope I get a restful night's sleep! 49 days until school starts!!!! Thank you all again.

~ Moon

Day 3 of disengagement is winding down. DH made dinner tonight and called me downstairs to eat. This was the first time I'd seen SDstb13 since Monday. I didn't look either of the SDs in the eye very much. I even had earplugs in because tstorms make me jumpy so I didn't have to hear much either. SDstb13 was telling DH what she cleaned today. I don't know if DH asked her to do these things or if she is volunteering. With all of her electronics/computer taken away, there's not much else to do.

Well, remember I thought she faked the shower Monday? If that's the case then she hasn't showered since Th 7/3. Her long hair is getting greasy in front and sticking to her forehead. I was dying to comment at dinner, but I didn't. DH didn't remind her to shower either. Oh well. I don't get close enough so I don't smell anything. She doesn't sweat much, so thats good. Maybe by tomorrow she'll shower and clean her hampster cage. I will def remind DH about the hampster cage by Saturday because they all leave Sunday for the beach. It will be so nice and quiet.

DH is being nice, I thought he might be an ass with me not doing anything around here. This is working! 47 days until school starts!! }:)

~ Moon