The Wedding. We had the talk last night
We talked,
It was difficult. I was honest. First, I told him all that was bothering me. He countered with my moodiness was affecting not only him, but his daughter. We agreed to end it.
So for the next hour or so, we wandered around the kitchen trying to figure out where to go from here. What we do with the house...etc. He laughed and said that I was so practical about the logistics of it ending. I admitted that I was devestated that I was losing my best friend.
So for the next while we talked and tried to figure out what we could solve and what each of us could do to make this work out. I'm not entirely sure if we decided to go forward with the wedding on oct 4.
I've started counselling, his turn is next Thursday. He has suggest that SD8 go as well.
I'm still nervous about all of it.
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good luck to u
i know this decision, whatever u decide, isnt easy. im glad u are getting counseling and him too, but may i ask why he feels that SD needs to go? to me, this is between u and him, and his feelings towards his daughter and the guilt of breaking up w her mother. maybe im naive, but i dont see why she needs the counseling too.
i hope this works out for u, in whatever way u need.
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
I think if he is open to SD going
then by all means. I think for men to agree to counseling, AND agree to take their kids to counseling is huge.
She doesn't have to go to all the appts. I'm sure the counselor will work with everyone and really, from my experience that's the best thing to do.
"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra
yeah i see ur (and steves) point
i guess i just figured they needed counseling rite now to determine if they are staying together and working thru that, and then if they do, maybe incorporate SD. bc i definitely see the point of that, i guess i just thot that for now, their relationship was the focus, and not necessarily the whole family.
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
My FH also loves to throw
My FH also loves to throw that at me too - your behavior and attitude affects the whole household. I throw right back at him that it goes both ways. When he and his kids trash my house with no regard for me - it affects me too!! Best of luck to you BRIGHTSIDE!!
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin
I love how they think its
I love how they think its one sided.. That they dont add to the stress, that their angels didnt add to the tension. HELLO!!! Dont you want to say.. when you met me, I was a completely happy RATIONAL person, who LOVED children.
LOL!!
yep!!!!!!!!!
i love the "u knew when u met me i had kids" line...um, yeah, i did...what i didnt know was that ur ex is a PSYCHO who is hell bent on destroying us and hating me b/c of my mere existence who would falsely accuse me of abuse, harrass me on our property, harrass us via unnecessary nonstop text and calls, change the visitation schedule at her whim, take us to court and doubling CS, etc etc etc...
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
Wow! You two really hit the nail on the head!
I love this dialog!!!!
"YOU knew when you met me I had KIDS!"
What would they say if you replied,
"And YOU knew when you met ME that I like to have healthy boundaries...peaceful and reciprocal and respectful relationships and MY SANITY!"
"Om Tare Tutare Ture Mama Ayurpunye Jnana Putin Kuru Svaha"
~Sita Tara Mantra
maybe i'll try that next time zen ;)
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
No kidding Frustrated and
No kidding Frustrated and Bella - he thinks that his and their behavior is completely normal!! There's nothing wrong with leaving clothes and towels all over the floor, or snack wrappers and empty glasses and cans all over the living room or sitting in front of a computer for 10 hours at a time. Ugghhh!!!
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin
How did you know bella!
That he used that line: "you knew what you were getting yourself into". I countered with, "I didn't get into it thinking we would end up where we are right now." and "just because I get on a airplane knowing that it might crash, doesn't mean I'm to blame for it crashing"....
im psychic ;)
good counter...almsot as good as mine!
"Given the right reasons and the right two people, marriage is a wonderful way of experiencing your life."
~the late great George Carlin
Glad it went well...
It's not an easy road but if everyone is trying (i.e. counseling) then you have a good shot! Best of luck...
Ohh.. LOVE the plane
Ohh.. LOVE the plane crashing comment!!! love that!
I get the, wish we could back to when we first met and how nice it was when all 4 of us would hang out together.. and I said.. No kidding... me too.. They were quite agreeable 4 yr olds, and even as 5 yr olds.. Sometime after they hit 6, they changed toward me, and that is all to do w/YOUR EX!
I will be sending
good vibes your way for a peaceful solution! Good Luck
Well said Steve -
Well said Steve - thanks!!
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. - George Carlin