I met my wife 11 yrs ago. We dated for 5 yrs and have been married for 6. Very early on we knew something wasn't right with SS. As a smaller child, he through tantrums, had nightmares. As he got older, he would lash out physically and verbally. I was never able to create a bond with SS because he is so different than I. He is on 4 meds to try to control his bi-polar and mood swings. He is now 15 and he had trouble with the law ( sexting with pics to other students ), is smoking pot, failing classes and recently admitted ( we had assumed all along ) that he is gay. He has a bad relationships with all males in his life incl BD and now will not go for the 10 days a month with his dad leaving the rest of the family incl myself no break from him. The last few years i have come to resent him and wish he would just live somewhere else. He is a cancer in this family. I have 2 stepdaughters and 1 biological daughter as well and my 3 girls are the best. I love them dearly. My dilemma stems from the turmoil that my SS causes between myself and his mom. She feels guilty that SS suffers from BP and is way to easy on him in my opinion. She blames the men in his life for not bonding with him so she feels the only person he has is her. I consider divorce often just to get away from him. My feelings of resentment for him run deep and now his sexual orientation further alienates me. I feel my wife just stays with me because I am good for the girls but she resents me for disliking her son so much. I would vent to her ( she is my wife right ) but she says the things I say hurt and that she is his mother and i need to vent somewhere else. So here I am. I have no doubt that if I did not have a daughter of my own with mother I would have left this relationship already. However, I do not wish to put all 3 girls through a divorce. i just recently discovered that SS has stolen from me and lied about it. My wife I discussed different punishments but could not agree on any. She felt that being grounded for 3 days and no sleep overs with friends for 2 weeks was too harsh. She has just left to pick him up and go talk with him at Starbucks and i asked to go and she refused to take me. We have been to numerous counselors both for SS and for marriage/parenting. Another fear I have is if I did divorce, SS would seek revenge on my biological daughter ( who is 8 ) when she stayed with her mom. My dislike for SS is now consuming me and is a major disruption in my life. What should i do??????