DH has had his boys since all of their lives. BM left when the youngest was 6 months old. I have a BD17. When I came in the picture my DH told me that BM was not involved and didn't want anything to do with them. He lived in Mexico at the time, she lived in Florida. We got married bought a house, became a blended family. Fast forward, I don't even remember when it happened, she started contact with the boys. Soon enought, they started telling me I wasn't their mom, being extremely rude, etc. The past eight years has been a big rollercoaster ride. The oldest boy was smoking dope, sneaking out of the house, breaking so many rules, doing so so in school, 3 Cs 1 D, always trying to test the waters. We stopped buying him so many things because we asked that he keep his grades up in order to have things. My BD17 is a great student, 4.56 weighted GPA, my father bought her a car. SS17 felt it was his right to have a car too, and he often spoke to his daughter in a very disrespectful tone and when his dad would discipline him, he would say "send me to my mom then" my DH has primary custosdial responsibility, we live in California, she lives in Florida. For the past 6 years, she keeps telling the boys that their dad stole them from her, blah blah blah, but she will not do anything to get custody of them. She doesn't work, lives with her boyfriend and only has them during the summer, she feeds them so many negative things about us, tries to convince them that they need to be with her, etc. Last month my DH just had it with SS17 and sent him to his mom. Now he is telling everyone that his dad kicked him out and that he chose me over him. He refuses to accept that he was misbehaving and that he didn't want to listen to his dad. To make things worse, his BM was intefering when his dad would discipline him because she was upset because we didn't help her with ther travel costs to visit her for Xmas break. One time he was hanging out with "bad friends" SMOKERS, DEALERS so his dad told him to come him, he got a call from the BM telling him not to expect him after school because she had given him permission to hang out with his friends (mind you, she lives in Florida, we live in California). That was the straw that broke the camel's back. Now she's upset because she doesn't have money to support him. We are working with a lawyer to see what he has to pay for child support, the other two will still stay with us, we are going to ask for sole custody of the boys. Thank you for listening.