You are here

SD has to be "The Grownup" when dealing with BM

maggie925's picture

There has to be a law out there somewhere that says it's a crime to mess around with kids minds. Recently, SD wanted BM to come see her since it's been nearly 2 years since thier last visit. BM said she'd come Dec.21-24 and stay at a motel only if SD would be able to spend the night with her. As hard as it was to agree to this, we decided that it would be okay since SD is 14 now. A few days later, BM calls and says she can't afford to come for 4 days and it would ruin Christmas for her other 2 children if she had to spend all of her money on a motel. Now she wants SD to visit her at her apartment that's 8 hours away. SD doesn't want to go. Her life is here with us and we have plans already. SD just wants her mom to come see her here, even if it's just for one night. SD told BM that she doesn't expect anything from her for Christmas. BM said she's not coming for just one night so if SD won't come to her house then forget the whole thing. AND THEN BM HUNG UP ON SD!

SD was hurt, but not shocked. I explained to SD that since her mom dropped out of high school, she seemed to stop maturing emotionally and sometimes relating to BM is like dealing with a teenager. I just hate that SD has to deal with this crazy situation.

Comments

Colorado Girl's picture

but be proud, you are raising quite a young lady! Good for you.

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...It's about learning to dance in the rain."

sparky's picture

SD doesn't want to go with a total stranger and spend the night so even at a very young age your influence has had a positive impact. You and her dad are her security blanket and she wants to be with the 2 of you so she needs to take a stand, either the stranger comes to her or she doesn't see her at all.