Alright, well.. I've had my ranting posts here when I was still with the ex fiancee, and I had my "problem solved" post where I let everyone know that I was done, and OUT...

Well, I guess it's just been difficult for me to leave her for the vultures of society to pick clean... We've been talking this week about getting back together, but going SLOW.

Slow basically means I won't be moving in, I'm getting my own house, I will no longer play step father every other week. I'm not being the hero character that's supposed to hold the family together, she was doing it just fine for 2 years single and alone with her daughter. She can do it again. I still have my space, my stuff, her, and I won't be a huge part of the SD5's life for a while yet.

I told her when I manage to get the house I'm purchasing up to parr and granting our relationship is where it needs to be that she can move in with me and rent her house out. (My new house is going to be in the foot hills here in Colorado in the South Deer Creek Canyon) Finally got my "house in the hills" 3 acres, 3 bedroom ranch style, car port, garage.. Plenty of room for my drums, motorcycles, tools, bicycles, cars.. Toys... I won't be living in suburbia anymore so I won't be moving in with her, but her house is a great candidate for a rental property, and we could pay what's left on her mortgage with the rent payment and she could just help me with my mortgage like I was doing when I was living with her..

This gives me time to mature myself for being the step dad I can be. Allows me time to get my life back under control. She is currently in counseling to fix her emotional issues that haven't ever been dealt with (big part of my leaving) and she's also taking her court ordered parenting classes for her divorce. She's shown me a lot of character in that she didn't go run to some other guy, she didn't run to her ex husband, she hit rock bottom and still wants nothing more than me in her life.. We're going to spend some time together tonight, sober (another one of our issues) We're going to sit down and talk, both of us have been writing down our feelings, emotions, needs, wants, future plans, ideas on how to raise the SD5 and how to make the SD5 a better, more disciplined little girl, our fears, and what we think was good and bad about the "old" relationship.

Just lookin for a little feedback, as y'all have seen my posts at their worst during the last few weeks of our old relationship. What do you think? We're both mildly apprehensive about the situation, but we both love each other to death and our chemistry is something like I've never experienced in my life.

Thanks in advance!