I have been with my husband for 2 years, but have known him my whole life. I have also known his daughter since she was born. She was always a difficult child, one you would observe and ask yourself, "is there something mentally wrong?" She never seemed to bond with her mom. The only emotion she actually showed was anger. I tried watching her for a while when her mom decided to return to work but had to stop because she was too violent, strange, and impossible to handle. Fast forward 4 years..... her mom passed away when she was 2, never saw one ounce of emotion, probably too young??? I fell in love with my husband and decided she just needed guidance, not pity (she received tonnes of that, whole family let's her away with ANYTHING!!). The last 2 years have been a huge struggle. She has improved and people have told us that they've noticed change. This has all been me, my husband works a lot so I am the primary caregiver. I also have 2 children of my own. All kids have their issues, but I am getting really tired of doing all the work. My SD and I have an awful relationship. She hates me for all the discipline, as I am the only one that does it. I am tired of her because she is such a problem. She is the only thing that my husband and I ever argue about. There is something wrong with her, either that, or she is just dumb. I know that sounds mean, but it is true. She will be 5 in October. She stares constantly, with her mouth hanging open, she does not answer when spoken to, she is constantly fidgeting, picking her nose, her crotch, picking at her clothes until they have holes or are stretched beyond belief, she can be very violent (biting my kids' faces), she talks and acts like a baby around his family, she has NO common sense, she is constantly getting hurt ( a result of the lack of common sense), she screams bloody murder over EVERYTHING, she is slow at everything, has no social skills, the list goes on. The worst part is that she is an extremely slow learner, and a very fast unlearner. This adds up to a frustrating kid that not many people like. A lot of her behaviors are not going to go over well at school or in society when she is an adult. Her dad knows this, and always says he wishes she wouldn't do this or that, but is too worried about being her friend to do anything. That is not fair to me. He is setting her up for a hard life. He even says she has a tough road ahead of her. I have been working with her for so long, but I am ready to give up. If he doesn't care, why should I? I have suggested taking her to see someone, but he doesn't want to. It would really help to know if there is a learning disability at work here. I don't think it's because of losing her mom because she was born like this. He has decided not to send her to kindergarten because she is not ready. His biggest reason though is that my daughter is going and he worries that she is too smart and will make his daughter look dumb. I am just so fed up. He needs to stop burying his head in the sand and deal with her problems. I have my own 2 kids from a previous marriage and we have a new baby together. I have enough to deal with. I feel like dealing with her always stresses me out and puts me in a bad mood and it's not fair to the other kids. My family has suggested that I give up. It is his job, and if he is not being consistent and supportive I should let her be his problem and worry about my own kids. Any advice would be great, I think about this constantly and hope that washing my hands of her would be a stress relief.