For those of you who have read my posts, you know that my SD17 has really ramped up her bad behavior lately. She has messed with my work laptop, locked the door the her room, and has had just a flat-out bad attitude for several weeks straight. Friday night was no different, but it was kind of a microcosm of her bad behavior, as she managed to hit on several of core issues. Here is what happened:

1. SD is in band, not because she wants to learn how to play an instrument, or learn the value of teamwork, but because she wants to go to NYC for a parade next year (every few years, the band gets to play in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade). She freely admits that she is just in the band for the trip, and will be quitting as soon as possible afterwards. As you might expect, her committment to the day-to-day activities of band is pretty poor. She routinely forgets to practice at home, never uses the expensive computer practice program we had to buy, and occasionally forgets her instrument at school. She added a new wrinkle on Friday, as she left her instrument on the bus.

DW got a call from the bus driver about 6:00 PM, and had to take SD to the school bus facility to get the instrument. Predictably, SD never apologized for forgetting the instrument, and DW not only failed to punish SD, she said not one cross word to SD about this oversight. SD is extremely irresponsible, and forgets stuff all the time, so it's not like this was a one-time problem. DW just carts SD all over town to pick up forgotten items, or, in some cases, recruits me to do it. I am getting tired of SD forgetting stuff.

2. Later Friday night, SD "asks" DW to do SD's laundry. Although technically phrased as a request, it was really more a case of SD ordering DW to do her laundy (if you could have heard SD's tone, you would know what I mean). DW starts working on the laundry, and realizes that SD has once again failed to turn her clothes right-side out. SD is lazy, so she just pulls the clothes off, and DW has to turn them right-side out to wash. To her credit, DW actually gets on to SD about this, and tells her to come turn the clothes out. After making a couple of requests, with no answer from SD, DW yells loud enough to make sure that SD hears her over the TV. SD then SCREAMS back at DW, "My back hurts, I don't want to get up!!!!!" This was so loud that I heard it all the way across the house. As you would expect, SD used a completely inapparopriate hostile tone, in addition to screaming. DW did nothing about this.

3. The topper of the evening came a couple of hours late. SD is really into "Ghost Hunters," and similar shows. DW and I think that these shows are ridiculous, be we don't really share that view in front of SD (wouldn't want to offend her precious feelings, you know). DW was working in the living room, where SD was watching the show. Apparently, the "investigators" on the show were listening to audio tape that supposedly captured a ghost speaking. Of course, all you can hear is a hissing sound, like static. DW joking makes a similar hissing sound, not in a mean-spirited way, just very lightly teasing the absurdity of the show. SD gets PISSED, and in a very hateful tone of voice, says to DW: "You can just LEAVE, if you are going to be like that." She was dead serious, and definitely not joking. DW did tell SD that SD should not be speaking like that, but SD said nothing.

In conclusion, another night that was pretty much par for the course. DW will occasionally stand up for herself, but will not do so consistently. As a result, SD has been emboldened to act however she wants, knowing that there are few, if any, consequences for such actions. It is very frustrating. I wish that SD would just go live with her perfect bio-daddy.