Just tired of it all....
I seriously wish DH and I could take all 4 kids and just disappear. We have too many irons in the fire at the moment and the approaching holidays are already starting to stress me out.
We have 3 exes to deal with between us and we have 4 open issues in court with 2 of them.
1 - DH is working on getting the mediated visitation agreement added into their court order - Back to the mediator December 6th for that issue.
2 - DH is working on getting a CS reduction due to his unemployment - Back to court on December 2nd for that issue.
3 - I am due in court next Monday (our 2nd court date) for a CS increase from my ex - First time in 12 years I've asked for an increase in CS and instead of negotiating with me he says he can't afford to pay anymore and instead spends money on a lawyer to fight it. :?
4 - Three days after our 1st court date for CS modification my ex decides to file for a modification of our custody/visitation papers but left the petition vague enough that I don't know what he is seeking to change. His lawyer filed the petition and I have filed my answer so now I'm waiting for the notification of the court date which I'm sure will result in my ex and I being ordered to mediation since that seems to be the standard practice in our county. I still don't know what changes he wants and he hasn't talked to me since August and he's only called our son twice since August 10th. The not knowing part is the part that is making me insane.
On top of all of this I'm freaking out about the upcoming holidays. If DH gets a job in the next four weeks then that will certainly relieve ALOT of my stress. But, if he doesn't, his unemployment runs out the first week in December and I don't know how we will afford to pay our bills much less afford to do anything for the kiddos for Christmas. Fortunately he has interviews with 4 different companies this week which is more action than he has seen in the job market in the entire past 12 months. We just need one....ONE BREAK...and so much of this stress can be alleviated. I know it won't make our exes and court issues disappear but it will allow us to relax about some other things and not be so terribly stressed out.
Thanks for letting me vent! I hope typing this will make me feel a little bit better. 
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Comments
Boy, you've got a lot on your
Boy, you've got a lot on your plate right now. I feel for you.
My H went almost all last year laid off. I was only working 20 hrs a week. too. Now that he has a steady job, BM is taking him back to court for increase in CS. I have to bite my tongue to keep from saying, "I told you so!" because he never filed for a reduction while he was on unemployment.
But I can't imagine being in your situation. My DS's father will be paying CS for a long time still. My DS is now 20 and living on his own so no worries there.
This should be the last time BM gets to take us to court as youngest skid just turned 16.
I don't know what I can say to help you except that you need to figure out ways to reduce your stress. Being stressed is NOT going to help any of your situations and probably will make things worse. Take a long soak in a bubble bath - no interruptions allowed. Or read a book you've been too busy to get to. Whatever it takes to take your mind off all this crap. Get some good sleep and remember that everything will work out in the end, one way or the other.
Thanks for the advice ladies.
Thanks for the advice ladies. I like the idea of getting all of my ducks in a row and then putting it in a folder in a safe place and walking away from it until the next court date. I'll have to try to accomplish that this week.
The timing just sucks. If DH gets a decent job his CS will likely go up when he goes to court on December 2nd. If he doesn't then it will go down even more but we are screwed money wise. I'm all for both parents supporting their kids financially but it pisses me off that all this time that DH has been unemployed his EX only saw about a $100 drop in her 'income' while DH saw a decrease of thousands in his income.
Meanwhile a few years back when MY EX was unemployed I VOLUNTARILY requested the CS office to drop our case while he was on unemployment. EX still had an order to pay but the CS office no longer garnished his pay or intercepted his tax returns. I gave him 2 months after he got a job to re-open our CS case. How does he repay me now???? He decides he'd rather spend money on a lawyer that put that money towards the support of his kid and follows it up with a petition to change the custody/visitation schedule that HE AGREED TO in 2004. You can't convince me that after 6 years he's suddenly not OK with our parenting agreement.
I swear sometimes I get so sick of getting screwed as I walk along the path of the higher road! It makes me want to stomp my feet like a child throwing a tantrum and scream "BUT IT'S JUST NOT FAIR!!!".