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Wow, when DF steps up to disclipline, I get the blame,lol.

cain8cody12's picture

Submitted by cain8cody12 on Wed, 06/23/2010 - 2:10pm

:jawdrop: So, my DF and I are to be married on July 5th a little over a week away. We have gone through a lot with his BD's 15 and 12 in the last 2 years. He went through the guilt daddy syndrome and all that niceness,lol. Well now that we basically have his girls 24/7 365, I sat him down and told him I was not gonna live like this anymore. I told him if he wanted to continue down this path that was fine with me. I would no longer do anything for his girls, I would exclude myself from all events, I would also close our joint account and pay half of the household expenses but would no longer help with the bills he was left with after the divorce as those are his responsibility and I would no longer be at anyones beck and call. I was tired of being a live in maid to two disrespectful entitled children. I have two BS's of my own and believe me they know better than to disrespect me or my DF. So, fast forward 3 months from this discussion.....He has stepped up to the plate and done what a normal parent does....discipline, rules, boundaries, and chores. The remark comes from his oldest daughter last night that the only reason he is doing any of this is because of me!!!! I could not have felt any prouder!!! Guess what little girls, the days of entitlement and guilty pops are gone. Welcome to the real world!!!!!! Can I get a HELL YEAH!!!!!!!

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JMC's picture

Submitted by JMC on Wed, 06/23/2010 - 2:23pm

Hell Yeah!! Good for you! Hopefully they will thank you in a few years but hang on tight for now, my SD18 still tells anyone who will listen that her dad only tries to enforce rules and discipline because of me. Fortunately we aren't dealing with as much anymore, she's soon to be 19, graduated from high school and living with her grandparents.

Congrats on your upcoming wedding!

Jsmom's picture

Submitted by Jsmom on Wed, 06/23/2010 - 2:38pm

Congrats on the wedding. I hope they don't ruin the day for you the way mine did. My SD made the day about her and my stepson thought it was funny to drop the rings in the sand during the ceremony and refused to speak to anyone during the ceremony. The judge kept looking at him.

Anyway, as for him stepping up, congrats. I hope it lasts for you. The problem is once everyone lives together the blending becomes hell. It takes about a year to get in sync. Unfortunately for us that year was hard and since BM didn't support our rules at her house. She looks like the more fun parent and that is where SD14 would rather be. I am okay with that. DH is having a harder time. I hope your first year goes well with SD's. They are so much harder than the boys.

cain8cody12's picture

Submitted by cain8cody12 on Wed, 06/23/2010 - 2:44pm

Thank you both for the congrats! We have been living together for almost a year now and believe it or not the transition has not been horrible. The children get along great together so that is not an issue. Our major issue was the fact that his daughters did not want to share him with anyone. When he proposed the youngest one had a really smart a** comment about it and he set her straight right then and there and made her apologize so things are definitely looking up. I can't wait for our honeymoon!!!! 6 whole days laying on the beach ALONE with my new DH and NO KIDS!!!!!! LOL

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Wed, 06/23/2010 - 2:54pm

HAY YELL YAY YAH!

One thing my wife and I have always done fairly well is keep a united front with our son (my SS).

There have been a few times over the years where I have had to have THE talk with my wife that you had with your DH. But not often and not to any significant extent.

Congrats on the pending nuptials.

Best regards.

medusa's picture

Submitted by medusa on Wed, 06/23/2010 - 2:58pm

So, the other day SD12 and I were in the car, about 6 weeks after I married her BF. I gave her money to buy DH a Father's Day gift and told her that if she saw something else she would have to get her grandmother to buy it, that I was tapped out. She said that she could talk anyone into buying her anything she wanted, then she paused and added "well, except for you". I just laughed and said "yeah, that whole routine doesn't work on me. I treat you like a responsible person and I tell you the truth". This was one day after the famous "What would you think if BM let me dye my hair blue" screaming match ..... Well, she did ask "what would you think"....