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What should be done?

candice85's picture

Submitted by candice85 on Wed, 04/22/2020 - 2:34pm

Forums: 
Teenage Stepchildren

Hey, I haven't posted in a while so I will give a little back story. I have been in Ss life since he was 2 SS is now 16 and has been living with us for about 4 years now. My husband is a truck driver and is gone all week. BM get SS16 about once a month on a weekend I am the one that is raising him, we have 2 kids together BD11 BS3. SS is an ok kid he really doesn't give me trouble usually does what is ask without any arguement. The reason he came to live with us BM was fed up with him hurting his little brother they is a big age difference. She had caught him pushing him, pinching, kicking, hitting him in the head with his knuckles, so I didn't want him to live with us cause at that time we only had our daughter but I didn't want him to hurt her but hubby thought BM was lying and let him move in against my wishes. Well now we have a 3 year old boy and he is constantly doing things to him it is always while my back is turned or I am cooking or doing something my baby will just come in screaming crying red marks on his body and around his neck. 2 days ago bs3 was screaming the worst scream I had ever heard, he told me SS16 had shaken him he had big read marks under his armpit and more red mark around his neck!! I am very scared for my child I try not to leave him in the same room as him, I tell husband but he just says scream at him!! He doesn't take it seriously and stepson says I barely touched him. I have taken picture so I do have those but really not sure what I need to do sorry so long, thanks if you read and have any advise. 

ndc's picture

Submitted by ndc on Wed, 04/22/2020 - 3:09pm

I have no knowledge of your relationship with your H or your financial situation or anything like that, but I'll tell you what I'd do.  First, I'd install a nanny cam or similar in the rooms where BS and SS are likely to be together.  That way you can see what has actually transpired when BS comes to you screaming.  If SS is in fact picking on him (and with a 13 year age difference there is absolutely no excuse for that), you let your husband know that SS cannot be in the house with BS unless your husband has eyes on him at all times.  If your husband cannot make that happen, then you take your BS and you leave.  You owe it to your son to keep him safe from a 16 year old bully who likes to pick on kids much younger than himself.  On the way out, you should tell your husband the SS needs counseling, stat.  Of course, if you don't think your son is safe while you try to get actual evidence of what SS is doing, then you should leave as soon as possible.

candice85's picture

Submitted by candice85 on Wed, 04/22/2020 - 3:22pm

Thank you so much for your advice. I am looking into one of those lightbulb cameras! SO since he is gone all week he really doesn't like punishing any of the kids but he told SS multiple time not to put his hands on BS, but it hasn't helped!! The time before this I told him if it happens again I was taking the pictures straight to the police, but I ended up not, not sure what they would or could do?!?

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Wed, 04/22/2020 - 4:22pm

Protect your child!  Just shoot this  F-in kid and put him out of your and your son's misery!

WTF are you doing letting this happen?

Get him out immediately. If his BM is smart enough and courageous enough to protect her young child from her own violent toxic evil gonad ghoul then follow her lead. Only put his ass in prison with the big boys so he will experience in spades what he is doing to a 3yo.

Don't wait. Take the pics to the police immediately and get this POS in prison now  Shooting him after he kills  your baby will be too late.

Act NOW!  You have pics, call the police immediatly, press charges, file for and RO/PO keeping this POS away from your family and any other minor children.   Get his ass on the child preditor list for life. No quarter. Destroy his life before he kills your toddler.

Kee-khe's picture

Submitted by Kee-khe on Wed, 04/22/2020 - 7:03pm

I agree!

Why the fuck does BM get to "protect" her son from HER OWN SON, meanwhile you HAVE TO take in her little criminal-in-training, and put your little one's life in danger??? REPORT NOW. and kick your DH to the curb if he has the AUDACITY to get mad at YOU.

Thefatherismyfamily's picture

Submitted by Thefatherismyfamily on Wed, 04/22/2020 - 4:43pm

A normal household can't afford nanny cams. You don't need nanny cams for what you already know is happening in your home. Call child protection right away and get this kid into social services. There a thing called ACE Program for kids like him that is federally funded. They will get him into programs and make sure your young ones are protected from him and it may mean having him removed from your home. 

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Wed, 04/22/2020 - 5:41pm

I completely agree that web cams are not necessary.  Quality parents in the pre web cam years didn't need them.  They took care of this kind of crap effectively and immediately.

candice85's picture

Submitted by candice85 on Wed, 04/22/2020 - 7:45pm

Thank you so much, didn't realize that there was programs that would help me out!! 

Winterglow's picture

Submitted by Winterglow on Thu, 04/23/2020 - 2:45am

Why are you even tolerating this child's presence if your husband isn't there? HE is the parent, not you. Send him back to BM's (I don't give a flying whatsit what she says, this is HER child) and refuse to have him in your home if your DH is not there. This is 100% within your rights. BM doesn't get to sign off on her baby.