Opinions needed
Ok, first time here and not sure where to start so I will jump right in. My husband and SD have such a weird relationship IMO. Of course he sees no issues with it. She is 28 years old and most times dreeses very provocative whenever she knows she is going to him or us. I mean very provocative. What would be the reason to do that to see family? Right now, I can't even recall of the bizarre happenings over the course of 5 years together and 3.5 married but last nights was weird to me..... We were on separate ends of the sofa watching my favorite NFL team and he was on his phone A LOT. I didn't say anything even though I was irritated. It was MY team playing, not his so I figured he was not invested. When I looked at his phone I seen he was texting his daughter. He opened with, thinking of you..... To me, this is weird. Why is he thinking if her while we are supposed to be watching a football game together? And let me add, he never send me texts like that. Ever. Am I being ridiculous or does anyone else find this abnormal?
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Just
EWWWWWWW!
My father would NEVER send a text like that to me!!!
I have noticed that there are
I have noticed that there are many women in the "younger generation" that equate dressing nicely to dressing "hot". I see them at work with the too tight/low/short outfits.. makeup overdone etc.. Even my SD's can go in that direction a bit. I get that they are "proud" of the way they look.. but sometimes it is a bit too sexy and I don't think they fully get how that is percieved by others.
So.. I don't know that there is anything weird about their relationship.. but it could be that she likes compliments and thinks that is how to dress to get them from anyone.. that she is dressing nice.. which looks to us as hotty totty.
As far as the "thinking of you".. it could be legit and not odd if he was checking in with her. Maybe in their last conversation she cried on his shoulder about a spat with a friend.. coworker.. boyfriend.. or had some vent about job, life in general or had a migraine. So.. "thinking of you... how are you holding up" kind of text isn't too off in that scenario. when you know someone is going through something.
If this were one instance of
If this were one instance of him texting her a lot, I'd let it go. But if it continually interferes with your time with him, then it's a bigger problem. Approach it not so much from "you text your daughter too much" but rather from the effect on you and what YOU need from a partner. "When we're spending time together, I feel like you'd rather be doing something else and don't really want to be with me when you spend all your time on your phone."
As to the provocative style of clothing, who knows. It sounds trashy. But you can't do anything about it. It would be nice if her father gave her some loving guidance on appropriate dress so that people are more likely to engage with her personality than with her boobs.
Over here
The skids (3 teen girls) FaceTime or text or both their dad almost daily and he them. Some of the silly stuff (pictures of the pets or something along those lines) I'm copied on. Other times I'm not.
It doesn't bother me though as he also texts me when one of us is away and I also know the girls are going through a lot with their crazy pants BM.
But my skids are all minors. If they were in their late 20's and texting all day I'd be a bit concerned too.