No boundaries
Ok, so I'm new at this forum but I think I might get some good insight or feedback about my situation. My GF has a 5 yr old and he has 2 distinct attitudes. When his mom is not home, he's very docile and follows all instructions; however, the minute his mom walks home, he becomes a total brat. He fake crys about every little thing. If he tris to hit me and I block his hand, he cries because he now hurts his hand on my arm and to make top it off, his mom then questions me as to why I hurt him, even after she sees him trying to hit me. I tell her I'm only defending myself and that she should be more concern with correcting his behavior to which she responds "he's a toddler, you're an adult"... And because I have 2 girls myself (10, 11), she always compares it to them saying "how would you like it if I hit the girls?". Anyway, has anyone been able to find a solution for having to deal with not just a kid like this, but also a GF (partner) such as this?
lol... I like that last
lol... I like that last sentence... I think I might use it for a meme... thanks! lol
Solution: leave and find
Solution: leave and find someone who is willing to parent their child.
Alternate solution: Leave and find someone who doesn't have children of their own.
she responds "he's a toddler,
she responds "he's a toddler, you're an adult".
She's the parent, he's the child. It is her job to teach him appropriate behavior, the fact that she is not, says a lot about her and none of it good.
Eventually, she is going to accuse you of child abuse or some such crap. Or involve your kids. What then?
Interesting you mention...
Interesting you mention... she has issues with how I parent my kids saying I'm too easy on them because their chores are only taking out the trash and sweeping; meanwhile, she rarely puts her laundry away, wash her dinner plate and generally leaves things where they don't belong. She's even got to the point where she once threw my kids shoes to the street saying they were muddy and didn't want them to get mud in the house... Now, if she would have put them right outside the door is one thing, but she literally threw them to the street... past our front porch, the sidewalk, and into the blacktop on the street. I'm not saying I'm a perfect BF or father, but I've never even come close to thinking of doing something like that to her kid or even to her. I just see it as, the kids have no say in our relationship. If she has a beef with me, why not do something to me? Instead, she does something that affect my kids.... yet, she accuses me of bullying her child if I simply tell him not to do something or he cant have something. Sigh!...
To be honest, she sounds like
To be honest, she sounds like a bitch.
What I meant my involving your kids was, someday, she may accuse your kids of abusing her kid, even if they are just defending themselves against him hitting them or whatever.
She doesn't sound like someone I would want to be with or want my kids around. Your kids don't deserve that.
you make it sound so easy
you make it sound so easy that I can just go find someone like that, lol. I would prefer someone who is also a parent because many times people with no kids have no idea the type of responsibility it takes to be a parent... so that takes out half the pool of options, but nonetheless, I find your ID very interesting because this is one thing I've always mentioned to my GF... be accountable. Don't hold other people accountable for something you wouldn't hold yourself accountable for... but that doesn't seem to get through to her. Anyway, thanks for the advise. We're in the last couple of months remaining of our year lease and I think we're going to be moving apart come that time. Maybe that'll ease off the tension.
Run.
Run.
Your girlfriend sounds
Your girlfriend sounds passive aggressive... Google it and learn all you can about it as a disorder as you are in for a rocky road because she will NEVER take responsibility for her actions and it will ALWAYS be your fault.
If she isn't pregnant with
If she isn't pregnant with your kid yet, then run! She sounds like a freak.
I wish I had something
I wish I had something practical besides cut your losses and get out. This will not get better, it will get worse. Check out the forums: teenage and adult skids.