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OT: My husband almost lost his life yesterday (sarcasm)

Elizabeth's picture

Submitted by Elizabeth on Tue, 07/28/2015 - 3:08pm

DH has an enormous stomach. I have a pouchy/flabby stomach since I gave birth to our two kids, but it's nowhere near as big as DH's. I also eat very well, I'm just prone to be overweight.

I am standing in our kitchen doing something and DH walks in, pats me on the stomach and says, "Suck it in."

He almost was killed.

Comments

Elizabeth's picture

Submitted by Elizabeth on Tue, 07/28/2015 - 4:58pm

Perpetually! Like when he was sitting in his chair in the living room last night asking me when dinner was going to be. Um, you want dinner, get off your as$ and cook it. Otherwise, don't ask.

Snowflake's picture

Submitted by Snowflake on Tue, 07/28/2015 - 5:21pm

My EX-hubs who was literally about 350 pounds once poked my emerging pregnant belly and made a laugh like the pilsbury dough boy. I was about 135 pounds.

Tuff Noogies's picture

Submitted by Tuff Noogies on Wed, 07/29/2015 - 9:10am

*almost* was killed? i would have lost my shit!!!!

(be careful tho' about your *threat* on your dh's life............) Wink

i'm one of the lucky ones, gawd luv my dh. i'm genetically anorexic looking, and when i put on a few pounds i wasnt used to it and got uncomfortable when dh would have his hand on my stomach. then he told me he loves my little "poooch" and it turns him on cuz it's womanly to have curves everywhere, not just hips (think like all the rembrandt women). i ended up putting on about 30 pounds that i wish to HELL i could get back, cuz i felt fabulous and liked what i saw in the mirror!

but a dh with a bigger belly than i, telling me to "suck it in"? aw HELL no!!!!!!!!!!!!