SS20 is out today ... free to run right back to heroin
OF COURSE no one was proactive in getting him into a facility as soon as he was to be released from the hospital. BMommy dearest has so graciously offered for him to stay at her house until things are figured out. Perfect place for a drug addict with no intention of quitting because she's a "recovering" alcoholic (who recently began partying and drinking again) who is NEVER home to take care of SS13 and SD12 let alone now junkie SS20! Congratulations moty! You just killed your son!
He had OD for the 5th time in a year (that we know of) and this last time was in a coma, developed compartment syndrome and rhabdomyolysis, and has had 6 surgeries to fix the irreplaceable damage he had done. His arm will never be the same and will not only have a scar from pec to wrist 2 inches thick, but will stay swollen double the size of his other arm for the rest of his life and who knows how much function will return! Basically the hospital is sending him on his way today with a months worth of pain and anxiety meds. Are you FU*&ING kidding me!? I guess it's "not their problem"??
On a positive note, I gave SO an ultimatum. I'm done dealing with SS20 and all the drama and heartache that drug addiction brings, especially since I've had to sit by and watch sO's entire family enable SS for the last year, resulting in all that has happened. I have dealt with drug and alcohol addicts my entire life and as an adult I was finally able to rid myself of those toxic people and I swore I would never put my children through that. I expressed as much to SO And told him it was up to him to decide where that leaves us.
I received a text about 20 mins ago stating that when he picks SS up from the hospital today to drop off at BM'S house he will inform SS that "if you return to drugs I am done, I will COMPLETELY turn my back on you, and you will be dead to me". Go SO!! ♡ Finally!! I just hope if I am not wrong about SS and he does in fact go back to his old ways, SO will follow through.
He's decided he doesn't want to lose me, he chose me! And in turn will force SS to choose life instead of drugs. Unfortunately SO'S family will probably still be there to rescue SS... but at least this kids addiction will never be my problem or a burden on my heart again.
I have never been so proud of SO. Let's hope things are looking brighter and happier in our home in the very near future!
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Before he was transferred
Before he was transferred hospitals he had a case worker that was talking about putting him in a year long intensive program that he could not leave ... not sure why when he was transferred no one perused that and the new hospital didn't immediately supply a new case worker. SO kept asking for one but nothing ever happened.
Friday he has court for his OD in February. He was apparently found guilty for possession so I'm praying they send him to jail, may be his only hope for quitting.
I absolutely 100% agree that
I absolutely 100% agree that her will return to drugs and I have expressed this to SO and his family on numerous occasions. It's sad but he will be dead for good this time. Your body can only bounce back so many times.
I agree that your SO needs
I agree that your SO needs the support group. Even though he has made the decision, it is going to be hard when his son returns to his ways. He will need the support and guidance that the group can give him.
I have to keep reminding him
I have to keep reminding him he's not the good kid he remembers and he'll never be him again. He may grow up to be a decent adult if he straightens out his life, but everyone needs to stop clinging to what he used to be.
He uses tears and guilt on SO most of the time and threats of suicide. SO just can't seem to see SS for who he is now, a manipulative, lying, full fledged junkie. (SS btw still refuses to admit that's what is going on too, so there's your first clue he's not ready to quit)
I'm dying to get him to NA but he's stubborn.
It's not the hospital's job
It's not the hospital's job to worry about what happens to him upon release. Sorry, sounds shitty, but it's not. They can make referrals, they can make recommendations, but they can't send someone home with him to babysit him and they can't make him go into a rehab program.
Your SO and other members of SS's family (BM and ILs etc) should have planned to check him into a rehab facility upon release. He is going to immediately go back to using and will end up dead and they're going to blame you and your SO for "choosing you"
I'm really surprised they didn't have to amputate, most of the drug users I've seen with compartment syndrome they end up taking the arm right off.
I'm surprised they didn't
I'm surprised they didn't have to amputate either! They said even 15 mins longer and his kidneys would have been too far gone. His arm and whole left side got so big. They cut it open and drained the fluid and then stretched the skin back over. He currently has only movement in his fingers but not full feeling and his arm is still swollen almost twice it's original size. He's extremely lucky, but I don't think this will be any more of a wake up than the last few times he's OD and died :/ maybe if they had taken his arm it would have been better.