BM does it again!
We have SS10 every other weekend, and BM has gone and booked to go away with SS10 on what is meant to be OUR weekend with him! She's already paid the money & told SS10, who is excited about it, so what are we supposed to do? If we stick to our guns & insist on having him that weekend then SS10 is upset because his mum has promised him a mini-holiday & we're not letting him go, but if we say 'OK' then we're letting her get away with walking all over us & manipulating when we have contact!
I'm getting more and more fed up with this bloody woman - she is push, push, push all the time & using her own son as a pawn to get at her ex!
Today I am struggling to see anything from her point of view, which I normally do try to do - where on earth has she got this feeling of entitlement from? What gives her more rights than his involved, completely NON dead-beat dad?
When I'm having my nasty thoughts I feel like dropping into conversation with SS10 this weekend "Oh, it's such a shame you mum went and booked that break for you guys, because we'd planned to go to Disneyland that weekend, guess we'll have to go without you!" - please note, I'm not this mean, and would never say it to a child - but we could have easily planned & paid for something ourselves for that weekend & she's ridden roughshod over us!
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At the very least your dh
At the very least your dh should insist that she give up her weekend either before or after to make up for that weekend. Our court order is VERY specific on this issue and Wingnut has never tried to take our weekend, she's pissed and moaned that we won't voluntarily give it to her, but never booked travel (then again that may be because she is too damned lazy to take her anywhere). I know it would suck for SS10, but unless dh puts an end to it, she'll continue to manipulate the situation. I might let it go this time, but the next time, I'd sit down with SS10 and explain to him that the rules are in place for a reason and that his mother should not be breaking the rules and you're sorry he is disappointed but he needs to focus that disappointment on something his mother did vs. you now allowing him to go. She has weekends. She should plan accordingly. This will teach him the importance of respect for other and time management.
God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy" and you can't change crazy!!
Part of the problem is that
Part of the problem is that there isn't a written agreement on visitation - they basically agreed between themselves on every other weekend plus extra time in the school holidays. Also, to complicate things, the weekends before & after we've got plans that we can't include SS10 in with, cos we try and do adult stuff when we've not got him (don't think he'd do too well at a beer festival anyway!)
When did I agree to this woman having such a big say about what goes on in MY life?
You are right for being
You are right for being upset. Believe me I know the feeling. This is probably not the first or the last time. I know it suck but think positive this benefits the child, So be happy for him.Try to shack this one off. The good thing is that you have nothing planned and I hope nothing comes up. Oh well all you can do is sit back and wish that its a cold and rainy weekend! LOL J/k
~Life's a Journey-So take a deep breath and enjoy the ride~
I agree, Just simply ask for
I agree, Just simply ask for another weekend, maybe she got a better deal for that weekend. But most def, stop that ball from rolling away.I wouldn't bring SS10 into it, I feel that DH should explain to wingnut that he would appreciate a conversation about this before she goes ahead and books something.. Sounds like she's a little selfish and has no respect for you two..
It sucks to have another
It sucks to have another woman have so much control over your schedule doesn't it? Our situation is similar but BM will have something come up and then her and DH are constantly emailing back and forth to "negotiate" the schedule. If she wants the skids for a weekend then we will usually have two weekends in a row and then she will have for two weekends in a row. We have the boys every Thursday night and BM Decided to get tickets to a concert WITHOUT ASKING US FIRST --- I told my DH it's because you let her do whatever she wants and she knows that you'll give in. It's bull crap!!
We go through this alot.
We go through this alot. Lately DH has been sticking to his guns and she hasn't pulled anything. When he used to give in, all kinds of schedule changes were made (for almost every one of her visits). DH has given SS9 a copy of the visitation schedule, so that way he knows where he is SUPPOSED to be and when. So that way if BM pulls something like yours did (again), SS9 knows that we aren't the "bad guys". Our visitation isn't court ordered either, it is as DH sees fit. He made BM a schedule.
"If I turn into another, Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me" -Incubus
Oh, she's just shot herself
Oh, she's just shot herself in the foot as far as I can see - just been checking Facebook & her status is about having got a ticket to go see a football match in London (just her & her bro) on a weekend she's meant to have SS10!
Right, fore warned is fore armed, I'm going to go book something right now for us to do that weekend, so when she comes whining to swap it around we can say no!